WCW Thunder - Thursday, 03/12/98
WCW Thunder - Thursday 03/12/98
"Hey, Paul, Can I Get You A Cup Of Coffee?"
- Trivia Question: How many times has Nikolai Volkoff held a tag belt in the WWF? (Answer at bottom of report)
- Hello, all...it's me! Sorry I haven't been around in a while. Work's been really busy and I've been swamped with my work on the Arn Anderson autobiography. Well, the good news is that the book is on its way to the printer. Look for sound clips from the interviews on Arn's official site soon. Also, some other interesting stuff will be coming up there coinciding with the debut of the book including a contest for a piece of Arn's personal memorabilia. Also, if you haven't already noticing the link I'm waving in front of your face on the main page, I'm doing a project for Buddy Landel. If you haven't already, you really should check out Buddy's site. Buddy has had, and continues to have, a fantastic career. From a timeline perspective, Buddy started wrestling professionally in 1979, so he actually pre-dates Arn by three years, and Buddy's four years younger! Buddy started in this business at something like the age of 17, and was wrestling main events at the age of 23. All the photos there are from his personal collection, and I'm looking for additional donations (which will be immediately returned to you after I scan them in).
- By the way, if you are on Prodigy, check out Arn's official page for information on him doing an on-line chat next week.
- Also, on a somewhat related note, I under the official Ted DiBiase site is due for some major updates. I understand that he's going to be putting stuff from his personal career scrapbook (dating back to the late 1970s) on line as well as lots of information about his Heart of David Ministry.
- The bad news is that I'm going in for some minor back surgery next Thursday night, the 19th. Well, as minor as back surgery gets. I will be getting a fill in reporter for the 19th as, while Thunder is on, I will literally be in the recovery room at Fair Oaks Hospital. Assuming I am sufficiently recovered, I will be going to Thunder on the 26th, and will be getting a fill-in reporter then. So, my next full report will be Thursday, April 2nd. But, the good news as far as the page goes is that sitting home for ten days will, hopefully, give me a chance to get caught up, even if I can only sit up for short periods of time each day. Heck, I've got nothing else to do while I'm sitting at home. You can only do just so many Cross Sum puzzles!
Also, in case you haven't guessed, I will still post the TV reports, although the report on the 19th probably won't be posted until the 21st, for obvious reasons. For those of you with a perverse curiousity, check out this frame from my MRI. The green arrow points to a disk that is normal. The red arrow is pointing to a bulging disk. And that bulging disk is bulging against a nerve. Ouch!
The upcoming guest reporter schedule is:
Once we get into April, I should be doing the Thursday Thunder reports regularly again.
- Hey, in the spirit of me going to Thunder, send me some ideas for signs. Either ones you've seen or one's you've thought of yourself. I'll post the best ones at the top of my guest reporter's report next week. I'll have two categories, one from signs that would make it on TV, and one for signs that the Keystone Cops would take away. ;-)
I'm thinking of bringing "Syxx Was Deep-Sixed", but I'm afraid Kevin Nash would jump the railing and kick my ass. Actually, on that note, in case, God forbid, mine is the only page you read, it's being reported everywhere that Syxx was given his release by WCW. Like the rest of you, I'll be analyzing any comments by Hall and Nash tonight looking for a shoot comment on the situation. In one of the funniest things I've read in a long time, Scoops noted that Syxx was fired via a FedEx. They wrote "When you positively, absolutely, have to can someone overnight...". Hah!
- One last note on the Monday report. Sorry it was late. About an hour ago, I got an e-mail from my ISP about the problem. AOL is having routing problems and a number of ISPs are having trouble sending mail to or getting mail from AOL. Unfortunately, Chan and Charlie's report was sent via AOL. So, there you have it.
- The mailbag:
- From an anonymous reader. When I say 99% of my e-mail is great, here's an example of the other 1%. I guess he was a little ticked that the report was late. Where you see a '*', you can probably guess what he typed. Some days, it just doesn't pay to run a web page:
Tell your butt buddies to get the Goddamn Nitro report out already.
F***ing s***heads, you type in the results while you watch them.
- Is it just me, or when Horshu does the "Horseshoe" thing with his arms, does he look like J. J. Evans going "Dyn-O-Mite!"?
- OK, everyone, time to use your imaginations. Imagine going to a concert of an ensemble band. Guys like Billy Joel, Elton John, Phil Collins (am I dating myself here?) making up the band. They put on a great three hour concert and, for the last number, the leader of the band brings out his best friend to do a solo. The guy's best friend is not really talented, is pretty washed up, and is only there because he's best buddies with the bandleader. For his solo, he steps in front of everyone and steals the spotlight. Now, you'd feel pretty ripped off, right? And then the next time you go to the concert, the same thing happens, again with the bandleader pushing this guy. How ticked would you be?
OK, now how do you feel about "The Disciple" being put over by Hogan at the end of Nitro two weeks in a row?
- I saw "More Secrets Revealed" on Sunday night. They did a segment on professional wrestling. My hint that the show wouldn't be too in-depth was that they were doing something like eight or ten subjects in the span of an hour. All they did was interview Killer Kowalski and show some clips of training. Basically, Killer didn't really give too much away. All he did was show how wrestlers protect themselves, such as when you are draped over the bottom rope, you put your arms over it so that if/when someone jumps on your back, you don't take the weight on your neck. Likewise when someone is throwing you by your hair, you hold onto their wrists. For a "smart mark", it was a non-event. It was sort of funny that they referred to Killer Kowalski's school as being "secret". I keep forgetting that for most of the world, I guess it is a secret.
- Bency Abraham sends the following link if you want to see the South Park kids as professional wrestlers: http://members.nwga.com/southpark/HTML/high.htm
- And, now, on to the show...
- Dark match: "The Cat" Ernest Miller defeated Glacier.
- We are live from Baton Rouge, Louisiana. And for those of you who are not Jerry Lewis fans, Baton Rouge means "red stick". It looks like everyone in the arena is holding a sign.
- The Giant shows up "unannounced" and walks to the ring. He talks trash about Kevin Nash and then offers to take every single member of the nWo on singlehandedly tonight. Out comes Savage and Elizabeth. Macho likes the fact that Giant is clearing the way for him to beat up Hogan at Uncensored and eventually go after the World Heavyweight Championship. Out comes Sting with the belt (for a change). Sting takes the mike: "It's not the title, it's my title". Savage: "Right place, right time, right guy, who knows?" Sting: "This is the right place, the right time...and I'm the right guy...tonight!" So, the match is made.
- This is a great start...let's see what happens.
- Raven pinned "Candyman" Brad Armstrong following a DDT.
- Before the match, Raven grabs the microphone and tells him he feels Armstrong's pain of his descent into mediocrity, giving a career history of Armstrong. Raven talks about how WCW takes their jealousy of "Bullet" Bob Armstrong out on Brad. Raven has Saturn at his side.
- I was very disappointed that Raven didn't bring up the Candyman gimmick.
- Then, as soon as the speech as over, Raven hits Armstrong with the Evenflo DDT. 1-2-3. The actual match lasted about five seconds.
- Schiavone brings Jericho out for an interview. Jericho is, of course, wearing his belt, a Rey Misterio t-shirt, and Juvi's mask. Jericho's feeling good, so he decides to give Malenko a shot at the Cruiserweight belt tonight, not waiting for Uncensored. It gets absolutely no reaction from the crowd. Since Jericho collects trophies, tonight's trophy will be that once he beats Malenko with his own Texas Cloverleaf, Malenko will have to rename it the "Canadian Jericholeaf".
- "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan pinned Kendall Windham following Old Glory.
- The only thing that can be worse than Kendall Windham coming to the ring is Hacksaw Duggan coming out next.
- Let's put Duggan against Goldberg.
- Heenan: "If Jericho likes trophies, he should have Misterio stuffed."
- Not much to say about this match other than it sucked.
- White Thunder (Scott Steiner) made Johnny Grunge of Public Enemy submit to the Steiner Recliner.
- Scottie needs to get a tan in his armpits.
- Scottie gets his head rammed into the turnbuckle ten times. How come that never happens to faces?
- Scottie does his new signature move and lifts the bottom rope as Grunge is straddling it.
- Immediately following that, Scottie pushes Grunge off the apron and through the table on the outside.
- Grunge is rolled back in and gets to kick back in the Steiner Recliner.
- Schiavone interviews Eddie Guerrero.
- Heenan really likes Eddie Guerrero and Chris Jericho. Go figure.
- Eddie got mixed up between the U.S. Championship and the TV Championship during the interview. Duh!
- Eddie goes on about how Chavo disgraced the family name. That brings Chavo out.
- Eddie goes on about how Chavo sucks. Eddie says they need to settle it man-to-man. But, once he (Eddie) wins, Chavo must start to do things Eddie's way.
- Chavo accepts if Eddie will do things his way if Chavo wins.
- Eddie accepts, and Chavo says let's get it on now...
- Eddie Guerrero pinned Chavo Guerrero, Jr. following a frog splash.
- High spot after high spot to start.
- Unbelievable somersault plancha by Chavo onto Eddie on the floor.
- Chavo hits the tornado DDT but Eddie grabs the ropes.
- Eddie hits a low blow, brainbuster, frog splash, it's over.
- Hall, Hogan, and Bischoff come out and prattle on. They didn't say a single damn thing worth reporting. Hall didn't even do a survey.
- Hey, Scott, where's Syxx?
- This week in WCW Motorsports. *yawn*
- Konnan made Lizmark, Jr. submit to the Tequila Sunrise following the 187.
- Konnan comes out to nWo A-team music. I don't think anyone is coming out to B-team music anymore. Either that, or they forgot to bring the music tonight.
- Vincent comes out with Konnan. Vincent certainly doesn't look like a guy who's been fired.
- Sign: "They took my sign"
- A couple really badly blown spots in the match. At one point, Lizmark gets a cover and comes off at a count of two while Konnan is still laying flat on his back on the mat, not having kicked out at all. Weird.
- Then, we cut back to the "hardway juice" view by mistake, and then pan back in. Weird, again.
- After the match, Konnan tries to take Lizmark's mask off and Juventud makes the save, only to take a beating at the hands of Konnan.
- Saturn made Disco Inferno submit to the Rings of Saturn.
- Lodi's sign: "Saturn - Ultimate Gargoyle"
- Lee Marshall kindly points out that Saturn's navel is now pierced. Damn it, Lee. Something I definitely did not need to know.
- Hard-hitting match. Lots of two-counts.
- The entire nWo defeated the Giant via disqualification when Giant powerbombed Konnan.
- The entire nWo in attendance tonight, eight guys (Hall, Hogan, Hennig, Adams, Vincent, Konnan, Norton, White Thunder), comes to the ring to start. No Kevin Nash tonight, and the announcers make note of that.
- The Giant comes out alone, in a neck brace, and, as usual, with no music.
- The eight guys goes out on the apron, so it seems it will be a regular handicap match, not Texas Tornado.
- Scott Hall starts, gets beat up for 30 seconds, and tags in Hennig.
- The nWo attacks one-by-one, and Giant knocks them all down, like a Kung Fu movie.
- The Giant powerbombs Konnan and gets disqualified.
- Doug Dillinger chains up the Giant, and walks him to the back. Out comes Kevin Nash with...what else but...a hot, scalding cup of coffee. The coffee gets thrown in Giant's face, Giant breaks the chains, and chases Nash into the back.
- "Iceman" Dean Malenko made "Lyin' Heart" Chris Jericho submit to the Texas Cloverleaf to win the WCW World Cruiserweight Title for the fourth time.
- Wow, Dean looks really weird coming to the ring. He looks like someone just scared the hell out of him.
- Jericho, wearing the belt and the Juvi mask, attacks before the bell.
- Jericho wrestles wearing the mask and a Rey Misterio t-shirt.
- After about a two-minute beating, Malenko locks on the Texas Cloverleaf and Jericho taps out, still wearing the mask. Malenko is the new cruiserweight champion! The first four-time champion!
- Malenko goes to adminster an additional beating, and to avange Juvi, pulls Jericho's mask off. And it's Lenny Lane under the mask!! Pysche!!!
- Jericho attacks from behind, clobbers Malenko with the belt, then clobbers Lane with the belt, and puts Malenko in the cloverleaf as we go to commercial.
- The announcers say that the title will not change hands. Interestingly enough, if this were the WWF, the title would change hands. In a similar situation recently, Owen Hart won the title from Hunter Hearst Helmsley when Golddust "masqueraded" as Helmsley. Which, of course, was just another way for a member of the Kliq to avoid doing a job.
- "The Total Package" Lex Luger defeated Scott "Flash" Norton via disqualification when Scott Steiner interfered.
- Whoo-hoo! It's been too long since we saw Luger rack a big, fat jobber!
- Like the rest of the DDT Digest staff, I just cannot understand why Norton is such a big draw in Japan.
- As the Scotts beat on Luger, Rick Steiner w/Ted DiBiase runs in the make the save. A brief battle ensues, and Luger and Rick are the kings of the hill.
- Sting defeated Randy "Macho Man" Savage via disqualification when Scott Hall interfered when Sting had Savage in the Scorpion Deathlock about two minutes into the match.
- Savage attacks before the opening bell.
- Sting takes a short beating, then no-sells.
- Battle goes back and forth. Sting's still wearing the trenchcoat.
- Hall interferes, then Hogan.
- Sting and Savage pitch them, and the rest of the nWo, including Apocolype (which Schiavone still claims not to recognize) comes out.
- In one of the lamest endings in history, Sting hooks himself and Savage up to a cable that dropped from the ceiling, and they both go up to the sky.
- That'll be why Sting never took off the trenchcoat...it was to hide the harness.
- Fade to black.
- imho, tonight's Thunder had a lot of potential, but didn't deliver...again.
- Trivia Answer: Three. One is easy, that being the one that he and the Iron Sheik won from Rotundo and Windham at Wrestlemania I. The other two are a little more difficult. Way back in June of 1970, as Bepo Mongol, he and Geeto Mongol won the (W)WWF International Tag Team Title from Tony Marino and Victor Rivera. The Mongols would lose the belts to Dominic Denucci and Bruno Sammartino in the Summer of 1971 and win them right back. They lost the titles for good to Luke Graham and Tarzan Tyler in November of 1971.
