House Show Results from Auburn Hills, MI, Saturday, March 28th, 1998
House Show Results from Auburn Hills, MI, Saturday, March 28th, 1998
by Jordan Duncan
- My day started off on a good note, then bad, then good again! First, and I
am SURE you all are dying to know, our bowling team went 4-0, and moved just 4
games out of first! Go team!
- Then I find my ride to the show, who is also the person I am sitting with, decided
to cancel, for work. Come on Dustin, bagging groceries at Farmer Jack? Or
watching Jerry Flynn get the Jackhammer? Oh no! I gave away a result! Well,
now you know, Goldberg won! Can you believe that? I guess the Jerry Flynn push
is over.....uh.....did it ever start?
- Anyway, I spend the day trying to find someone to go with me. Gosh, maybe I
got bad body odor, because all my friends ONLINE would go with me in a second,
especially considering I got 6th row seats! Instead, I get no answers or
filthy excuses. Finally, I go to my last resort....my girlfriend, who doesn't
even like wrestling.
- We get to the palace, I buy my "Dippin Dots" Ice Cream, and we find our
seats. Just our luck, we sit behind the man who's head is the size of Neptune.
And his little litter of oxen....I mean children, they are ALREADY standing on
- Anyway, Penzer finally comes out, yadda yadda, don't throw stuff, yadda
yadda yadda. By the way, the ring, and ESPECIALLY the steel cage looked really
smaller up close! He also mentions that Scott Hall isn't fighting
tonight....anyone else hear that he's in rehab?
- Penzer finally announces it is time to start, and we are on our feet!
Neptune moves over a seat, and I have a clear view of the ring! YES!
- Match #1- Psychosis over La Parka via Guillotine Legdrop.
- LA PARKA! In the programs, it was advertised as Psychosis/La Parka vs.
Juvi/Lizmark.....oh well, La Parka vs. Psychosis is fine.
- Maybe this was changed because Psychosis is getting a bit of a push
lately...it's not much, but he at least got a win!
- The La Parka strut right away! Then the leg wobble! And the crowd is going
nuts! Wow....last time, I was appalled by the fans here, now they pop for La
- A couple stiff chops by La Parka, and a clothesline. MORE STRUTTING! Thank
- Psychosis with a left-handed lariat, and a missile dropkick.
- They spill to the outside. Suicide Dive by Psychosis, hit it pretty good
- Oh yeah, I forgot! La Parka gave about 6 crotch chops to the crowd before
the match! Psychosis gave us the finger, and crotch chops as well!......yet
he's trying to be a face on TV, I think.
- Back inside, La Parka tries a powerbomb! Is Doug Dillinger ready to arrest
this man? Oh thank goodness, Psychosis reversed it into.....something. It was
botched pretty bad.
- La Parka, which I believe is Spanish for "The Parka" gets into Zack
Morris'...I mean Charles Robinson's face. Charlie don't take no jive talk from
the skeleton man though.
- Psychosis rolls up L.P.(not to be confused with L.T. who defeated Bam Bam
Bigelow) and I thought it was over, but only a two count.
- La Parka dives off the ropes, and gets caught. Psychosis goes up, and does
that legdrop of his, with the guy caught between the ropes. And he gets the
win! It wasn't his normal guillotine legdrop!
- OK, it's my celebrity lookalike spotting time. The "famous" Fake Hulk Hogan
was there, taunting the crowd. He's that guy who followed Hogan around
everywhere. I got a friend who told me, the deal with this guy is, he is
basically obsessed, and what he wants is to run an angle, where he is revealed
as Hogan's long lost brother, back for revenge, and a final match with the
Hulkster. Unfortunately, he's got a worse build than me.
- I also thought Konnan was sitting two rows ahead of us. The guy looked
EXACTLY like him, I swear. But his arms were bigger, he was the toughest
looking chico there! More on him later!
- Match #2 - Booker T. over Chris Jericho via Harlem Sidekick to retain the TV
- Man, forget what I said about fans here. They HATE Jericho.
- Chris gets on the mic, does the "Penzer, what city is this?" bit. Bad thing
is, Penzer told him, "Detroit". ACTUALLY, Dave, we are in Auburn Hills. He
goes on to say we all love him here, and he will leave as the first EVER
Double Champion in WCW, and there will be a parade for him tomorrow.
- Has there ever been any double belt holders in WCW history? Maybe...I don't
- Booker T. comes out to a huge pop.
- Lots of stalling beforehand, Chris gets on the mic again, "Hey Booker, they
don't like you." He imitates the raise the roof sign, and says, "No one likes
when you do THIS thing either!" Ha!
- Booker on the mic now, with Chris outside, "Jericho, get in this ring,
before I have to come out there and kick your @ss!"
- Really good match. If Jericho was to drop the Cruiserweight belt, a feud
with Booker for the TV belt would be awesome.
- Jericho with a vertical suplex, AND a backbreaker. Impressive that he could
toss the big Booker around like that!
- Booker T. with a sidekick that looked like it knocked a tooth out of
Jericho! Breakdance city! Scissor kick!
- Side note: Booker T. was announced as being from, "110th Street". Why don't
they give out all the other guys street names?
- Booker ends it with the jumping sidekick, I am pretty sure that's a Harlem
- Unfortunately, I couldn't see this match good, due to some moron holding up
a "Jericho Sucks" sign in the 2nd row.....it's not even televised, why bring a
- Match #3 - Bill Goldberg over Jerry Flynn via that one move he uses..... :-)
- I heard the radio station playing a commercial for this event a month or so
ago, they billed this match, "Undefeated Bill Goldberg takes on Karate Extraordinare Jerry Flynn in his toughest match yet!"
- Gosh, no wonder he's 62-0, if Flynn is his toughest yet! I could be 62-0 if
Jerry Flynn was my toughest opponent!
- Longer than a televised Goldberg match.
- HUGE pop for him, and Penzer only announces him as "GOLDBERG"
- Punch, kick, gorilla press.....and it LOOKED like a dragonscrew legwhip, I
kid you not! I couldn't see well, it might have been a spinning trip or
something. But it was still cool!
- They tease the spear! Goldberg sends Flynn-san off the ropes, and as he
charges Jerry ducks away.
- I wonder if Jerry Flynn would get pumped up if Mr. Miyagi started playing
his little drums. It worked for Ralph Macchio.
- Spear. Huge pop. Jackhammer. Huge pop. FLYNN KICKS OUT, nails a Crane Kick,
and gets the.....nevermind.
- Match #4 - Brian Adams over the British Bulldog via a Piledriver
- I saw Adams come out, and I grabbed my girl by the hand and proclaimed,
"Everything he does, he does it for you!" Then we got our food.
- All I saw of this match was on the monitors in line for pizza. The
piledriver was unexpected off the ropes.
- Weak match....Adams is still billed from Kona, Hawaii by the way.
- Match #5 - Chris Benoit and Diamond Dallas Page over Kidman and Sick Boy via
- Cheap. It was billed as Raven and Saturn! Raven got on the mic, babbled,
and ran away!
- DDP chases, and is jumped by the Flock.
- Somewhere in there, Saturn left. And Raven got a couple garbage cans tucked
on his head for his troubles!
- Back in the ring, Raven is gone, and Sick Boy and Kidman are there. Kidman
getting wailed by Benoit.
- He nails the Seven Year Itch, Benoit kicks out. I like that move. No, not a
kickout, Kidman's move!
- Hot tag to DDP, he cleans house. You know, I think the Flock is talented.
Raven, Kidman, Sick Boy, Riggs, and most of all, Saturn. I mean, they aren't
GREAT, but they all got talent.
- Benoit locks the Crossface onto Kidman. DDP bangs Sick Boy.....no.....
wait.... don't read that the wrong way! I meant he gave him the Diamond
- Wild match, but really good.
- Intermission for 20 minutes. Time to get my Outsiders shirt! The new Hogan
shirt is on sale. On the back it reads, "Yea, tho I fight through the arenas
and colliseums, I fear no one, because I know that I AM THE MAN." Sheesh. I
like the front of it.
- Match #6 - Ric Flair over Scott Norton via pinfall
- Norton replaced Scott Hall.
- Through the whole match, after ANY move, Norton signaled for the Flashback.
- Boy, he's a big dude.
- Tons of "WHOOOOS!" from the crowd!
- Stiff chops from both men.
- Shoulderblocks by Norton, then that flying one, hit good.
- Norton tossing Flair like a rag doll.
- Flair gets the legs, and a hiptoss!
- They went to the outside, where I could not see from my seat. I suppose if
I had stood up I coulda, but I was eating. So sue me.
- Hennig is making his way ringside!!!
- Whooooo! Flair hits the low blow!
- Norton distracts the ref, Hennig on the apron, with brass knucks on!
- Flair gets them somehow, puts them on, and kayos "Flash"! And the win!
- Hennig goes in for the necessary beatdown.
- Flair is saved by the one, the only....Koko B. Ware! Uh, I mean Bret Hart!
- That starts the next match......
- Match #7 - Bret Hart over Curt Hennig via the Sharpshooter
- Did you guys see Uncensored? Take out the Rick Rude parts, and you have the
- Hennig nails the Hennig-Plex, Bret kicks out. Guy behind me says, "That is
the first time anyone EVER got out of that." Besides Hart at Uncensored,
Ultimate Warrior, AND Hogan. I am sure others have too.
- Bret had Hennig up for a backbreaker, Hennig raked the eyes, and Bret
dropped him. I mention this, cuz he dropped him kinda wicked, right on the
- Sharpshooter victory!
- Match #8 - Sting over Hollywood Hogan via The Death Drop
- No Michael Buffer for us feeble Detroit peasants.
- OK, I don't care if you think Hogan sucks as a wrestler, or is a windbag,
or is a jerk. He has COOL entrance music, don't he?
- He gets in the cage about 34 minutes AFTER he's announced.
- Here comes a Man Called Sting! Not to be confused with The Man They Call
- Hogan holds the door shut so Sting can't get in! Ha!
- OK, now, end of show, everyone is drunk right? I am paying more attention
to the crowd. Remember our Konnan look-alike? A tall scrawny man is talking
trash to him. Look what alcohol can do to you. They say something like, "After
the show, punk."
- Both men bleeding, I think Hogan bladed, and Sting was hardway. Because it
was in the upper side of his face. Not right on his forehead.
- Sting with the Scorpion Deathlock, and Brutus comes in, and cuts Stings
- OK, well he didn't cut hair, but he got in! Match didn't stop. Sting beat
him as well.
- Scorpion Death Drop, pinfall. Show's over.
- Hogan and Bruti whine in the ring after.
- We get up to leave. The tall scrawny guy who picked a fight with "Konnan
Squared" RUNS past us, and I mean RUNS. He was scared, you could tell! Arriba
La Raza! I would be too!
- Good show, Booker T. vs. Jericho highlighted it! La Parka-Psychosis was
good as well. Even Hogan-Sting was good, for a Hogan match! The only bad spot
in my opinion, no Jericho T-shirts. And the Brian Adams match.
- Also, none of the hometown guys wrestled! The Steiners weren't even in
action! Also, I have HEARD that Kevin Nash is from Michigan.....anyone know
for sure? He lives in Arizona now I think, but I believe he originally is from
- All right, I have to add this. For those of you IDIOTS who feel the need to
get TOTALLY plastered at an event, read this. I can see a beer or two, but
read this. These four guys were sitting in a truck, right? They are waving their
signs afterward, talking trash to the WCW fans. One car stops. They give
crotch chops galore. Now, mind you, these four drunks are very small, weak
looking guys. One of them, drunk as a skunk, flies into a rage at the
belittling of the nWo, and runs up, and POURS A BEER INTO THE OTHER GUYS CAR!
All four doors open at once, four guys get out, pissed off. The trunk is opened,
ANOTHER guy gets out (yes, from the TRUNK) and they get crowbars! Shoving,
spitting and cussing starts. No one, thankfully, was seriously hurt, but it
could have been avoided if the guy wasn't so intoxicated, if you ask me. So if
you are going out to a show, don't make an idiot out of yourself, OK?
- Hope you all liked my report. For the people from Michigan, Penzer
announced they will be back on June 8th or 9th for a Nitro. Expect another
arena report, and to see me, front row!
- Oh yeah, on the way home, while listening to 95.5, they had "The Rock"
Rocky Maivia on talking about Ken Shamrock!