WCW Thunder - Wednesday, 3/14/2001

By Big Mike

Howdy everyone, once again. I am Big Mike, and this is your Thunder report.
First of all, what the hell was that crap on Monday? I agreed totally with Aldo's report. I'm sorry he had to watch the whole thing. I can't even begin to tell you how bad that sucked. I don't care what the current ownership situation is. Sidebar: being in the business world, the delay in the deal is not out of the ordinary. There are a bunch of hoops (government, financing, etc.) to jump through relating to a potential big sale like this. Anyway, whatever the situation, that Nitro was inexcusable. It actually made me not want to order the pay-per-view. The heels beat down the faces all night and "put them in the hospital." It actually looks like the good guys have no chance at the pay per view. What kind of build up is that? Looks like a damn nWo era angle. Second, and even more disturbing, was the tease of the "new owners" being there. What was that all about? Was it a ploy to get us to watch the pay per view? If so, it didn't work. Nothing was mentioned at the end about why they weren't there, and Schiavone and everyone just came off looking like a bunch of dumb asses. Come through on an angle for goodness sakes!!!! Even if the owners weren't going to show, at least give us something at the end to make us watch the pay per view! And when Hudson left for the back at the end of the show, it just showcased how empty Schiavone's commentary was. He sounded confused. Horrible, horrible show. As much of a WCW defender as I have been, and have been accused of being, I can't defend that.
Before I get too pissed off, some mail now, from my suggestion a few weeks back that readers write in with their ways to change WCW (and boy, do they need it).
- Michael C. from San Jose writes:
  
  I love the fact that you gave these two guys an amazing amount of space to express their ideas. I think both sets of ideas to improve the WCW are great. I started watching WCW when all I got at the WWF was PPV preview matches each week and at WCW we saw contenders duking it out week after week.
  I also loved the idea of STARRCADE being on TBS. A FREE PPV once a year!!!!
  I also think the Mutha Ship should come back to develop young talent. I think it should be a cross between sorry old guys (sorry Hacksaw) and young talent. They should have all of their own titles and be something other than WCW, like the WMS (WCW Mutha Ship) Championship. Let Dusty be the announcer/commish. And whenever any real talent showed up they would get BEAT by Barry Horowitz or Fidel What's-his-name (the Castro guy). And once a year let the WCW wrestler come and take the title from the WMS guy and have him come to Monday Night and take it back!!!!
  I think it was XPAC/123KID/Thatskinnyguy that actually got a title when some big name wrestler in the WWF passed out in the ring. It would be funny if this sort of thing happened from time to time. Imagine Scott Steiner drinks too much cough syrup and passes out during falls count anywhere and gets pinned by one of Goldberg's security guards. Of course we watch him run out of the ring for a couple of weeks until Ric Flair organizes a lumberjack match. But this kind of FUN attitude doesn't exist anymore.
  There is SOOO MUCHH that can be done with the tools that are available!!! Only the wrestlers currently getting the PUSH like McMahon and he is hated in his industry more than Don King is hated in his!!!!
  Thanks for reading...
  
  Not sure about the one with Steiner drinking too much cough syrup. However, we welcome all opinions here at DDT Digest.
One more time: I've never seen a more disorganized, confused, poorly written show as I saw on Monday night. It made the XFL look like riveting TV by comparison.
Well, let's go to the show now. I almost hesitate to watch it now.

We start with a montage of that crap that was Nitro from Monday, including the Midajah angle that was never finished, the Stacy Keibler angle, and everyone getting the crap beat out of them. No mention of the "new owners" angle
Interesting that one of the Harris Brothers is shown in the opening sequence of Thunder. Rumor has it they were let go today.
We are TAPED from Knoxville, Tennessee.
Tony Schiavone and Mike Tenay commentating.
We open with the last semi-final match of the Cruiserweight Tag Team Title Tournament
Three Count (Evan Karagias and Shannon Moore) vs. the Filthy Animals (Rey Misterio, Jr. and Kidman) in a Semifinal Match of the Cruiserweight Tag Team Title Tournament Match
- Maybe I should have run an office pool on this deal instead of the big deal starting tomorrow. Naaaaaah.
- It will be Kidman and Shannon Moore to start.
- Nice snap head scissors by Moore.
- There are a lot of fans dressed as empty seats.
- Kidman with a reverse neckbreaker.
- Misterio is tagged in and immediately hits a split leg moonsault.
- Moore makes it over to tag Evan Karagias.
- Misterio with a springboard head scissor takeover.
- Karagias catches Rey off the ropes and hits a spinebuster.
- The winners will face Elix Skipper and Kid Romeo at Greed.
- Tony says a lot of backstage mysteries took place on Monday. Tenay says many questions remained unanswered after Monday. No s-t, Sherlock.
- Kidman with a side slam as he's in with Shannon Moore now.
- Moore throws Kidman out and Kidman is worked over by Karagias.
- Karagias is tagged in and hits a vertical suplex on Kidman.
- Bulldog by Karagias but only a two count.
- Karagias tries to springboard off the ropes, but Kidman hits him with a drop kick.
- Hot tags by both men! Springboard into a Thesz press by Rey. Springboard moonsault by Rey!! Tornado DDT by Rey!! Wow, Moore kicks out.
- Karagias is tagged in. He immediately hits a swinging neckbreaker. Karagias goes up top for a 450 body press. Kidman breaks it up very sloppily.
- Moore misses a pin attempt on Kidman.
- Now Karagias is out and Moore gets a flying elbow by Misterio and a Bronco Buster.
- Rey tries to go up top, but Karagias breaks it up. Rey crotches Karagias on the top rope and down to the floor. Thesz press by Rey on the floor!
- Kidman with a cross body on Moore and Karagias outside the ring.
- Rey hits a dropkick on Moore as Kidman holds him in a surfboard type maneuver, and Rey gets the three!
- YOUR WINNERS: Kidman and Rey Misterio, Jr. via a dropkick
- Primetime Elix Skipper and Kid Romeo come out to attack the Animals, but Kidman and Rey clear them out of the ring.
- A few missed spots, but you always get the feeling that Kidman and Rey work their asses off every time out, and that can't be said for all of the WCW talent.
Backstage, I guess we're seeing the cafeteria in the security camera. Disqo and Alex Wright are eating, and Disqo keeps eating off of Wright's plate, and Wright finally pushes the table over on Disqo and yells "I'm sick of you!!"
Here comes DDP to the ring, through the crowd of course. Page reiterates that he's still standing. Page says at Greed, he's going to be "talkin' loud, bein' proud, and good gawd, drawin' a crowd!!" That was sort of funny. Page says he's going to take the title from Steiner on Sunday.
More music and it brings out Dustin Rhodes. Rhodes looks puzzled, as does DDP. Page says he's in the middle of an interview. Rhodes says that Flair sent him out there. Cut to Flair on the video camera. Flair says Steiner is off tonight, and the Cat and Booker T are out of the building. He makes a match with Jarrett and Rick Steiner for Rhodes and DDP. Oh no! Rick Steiner in the main event. Flair uses the "is it live or is it Memorex" line, as Jarrett and Rick Steiner, who are on the tape with Flair attack Rhodes and DDP from behind. Rhodes and DDP clear out the ring.
Thought: How often does the Rock, being the WWF champion, get a night off from Smackdown, especially right before a pay per view? Answer: Never. Which shows how much WCW values Thunder, with champion Scott Steiner not being on the last television show before the pay per view.
Jason Jett vs. Alex Wright
- Oh goodie.
- Jason Jett is wearing some kind of Nancy-boy type tights. They look like pants with the thigh areas cut out. It says "Skyfire" on his ass. Tony says it's because Jett likes to go up top. Huh? I don't know what he means, but I had Skyfire on my ass after going to Taco Bell the other night.
- OK, where were we? Oh yeah, the match. Jett with a standing flip over the rope and hits a clothesline. Tenay says it's called the Afterburner.
- Standing moonsault by Jett. Two count only.
- Instead of firing guys like Crowbar, why don't you fire Alex Wright, who you never use for anything other than dumb angles?
- Wright takes Jett up top and hits a superplex. Jett kicks out at two.
- As Jett is on the apron, Wright hits a forearm off the ropes to knock Jett out to the floor.
- Outside, Alex slaps Jett. Tony says in a moment of brilliance: "As Alex would say, that's to teach the man a lesson." Ummmm, OK.
- Back in the ring, Jett with a small package for a two count.
- Alex puts Jett in a hammerlock.
- Wright clotheslines Jett and goes up top, but Jett crotches him on the rope. Tenay: "Alex Wright just had his identity changed in the corner by Jason Jett." What????????? Have they been smoking something tonight?
- A springing elbow Tenay calls the Shockwave by Jett.
- Outside the ring, Johnny is working over Stasiak and finally throws Stasiak back into the ring. Spinning heel kick by Johnny. Two count and Stasiak rolls outside the ring.
- Release vertical suplex by Jason Jett and it's over.
- YOUR WINNER: Jason Jett via the "Crash Landing" (as called by Tenay).
- Jett looked pretty good, but damn Tenay had a name for every move he had. I'm expecting him to say "Pile driver, a move Jett calls the Crotch Sniffer!"
Back to Flair's "documentary." Flair and Luger are talking about what happened to Midajah. Buff is filming. Flair, who I think Buff just called "Fleihr" says he's going to put Palumbo and O'Haire in a four corners elimination match with Totally Buff.
Montage of the events that lead up to Booker T vs. Rick Steiner for the U.S. Title.
Shawn Stasiak w/ Stacy vs. Reno
- Stasiak and Stacy spout off some nonsense on the mic. Stacy calls Shawn the Mecca of Manhood and kisses him. Stasiak calls the fans "fat, tattooed, bald, and toothless losers."
- Reno comes out and says, "Hey, I hear you got a problem with tattooed, bald guys." No, they have to be fat, toothless, and losers too. Oh well, Reno just needs to be fat and toothless.
- Side slam by Stasiak. Two count.
- "Meat" chants start in the crowd. Nice.
- Tenay says Reno is an undefeated pit fighter.
- The crowd is absolutely dead for this one.
- Gut wrench suplex by Stasiak. Two count.
- Reno catches Stasiak with boots and then a clothesline.
- Fisherman's suplex (Perfectplex) by Reno. Two count.
- Both men are on the outside now. Stasiak works over Reno and throws him back into the ring.
- Stasiak is up top and hits a top rope clothesline.
- Reno reverses a suplex, and tries for the Roll of the Dice, but Stasiak reverses again into a Hangman's neckbreaker for the win.
- YOUR WINNER: Shawn Stasiak via the Hangman's neckbreaker.
- Bad, bad, bad match.
- Stacy dances in the middle of the ring as Stasiak puts his autographed picture on Reno.
- Out comes Bam Bam Bigelow! Bigelow chases Stasiak out of the ring.
Watching the commercials, I got an idea for a match: Anyone kicking Matthew Lesko's ass. Man, that guy is annoying. "YOU CAN GET $1500 TO START A DIRECT MAIL BUSINESS!!!!" Shut the hell up.
Totally Buff (Buff Bagwell and Lex Luger) vs. Sean O'Haire and Chuck Palumbo in a four corners elimination match
- They show Palumbo pinning Luger twice and O'Haire pinning Luger once in the past two weeks. You think Luger's gonna job again? Probably not.
- We start with Buff and Chuck Palumbo in the ring.
- There's a referee outside the ring as well for this match.
- Oops, someone missed a move. They showed a shot of the crowd for about ten seconds and when we come back, Buff is down and Palumbo is standing over him.
- Now O'Haire is in, a leapfrog press by O'Haire.
- Jawbreaker by Buff, and Buff tags in Luger.
- O'Haire with an elbow and a knee lift on Luger, but Luger comes back with an inverted atomic drop.
- Another crowd shot as O'Haire goes down. What the hell is this?
- Suplex by Sean O'Haire on Lex Luger. O'Haire tags Guff in, so it's Buff and Luger now, I guess. Luger pops Palumbo and Buff tags him in. It is a four corners match.
- Bagwell and O'Haire are outside. Palumbo tries to get a scoop slam, but Buff comes in and hits Palumbo in the knee. Bagwell rolls him up for the three count. So now it's O'Haire against Luger and Bagwell.
- Palumbo stays (?) and as O'Haire gets the slam. Palumbo pushes Luger's foot off the ropes as O'Haire gets the three count. Luger is eliminated.
- Short arm clothesline by O'Haire on Buff, who then hits the Sean-ton Bomb, and it's over.
- YOUR WINNER: Sean O'Haire and Chuck Palumbo via the Sean-ton Bomb.
- That was a very sloppy match.
Another security camera. It shows Mike Sanders and Disqo. Disqo: "I don't know if you heard, but me and Alex broke up." Sanders: "I didn't know you two were an item." Funny. Disqo tries to get Sanders to tag with him tonight. Sanders says no. Flair comes by, and says, "Hey Sanders, Animal says the toilet is plugged up in his dressing room. Go fix it, please." Sanders to Disqo: "Fix the crapper, wrestle with you, fix the crapper, wrestle with you. I'll wrestle with you tonight." That was pretty damn funny.
Montage of Dustin and Dusty Rhodes vs. Flair and Jarrett.
Back to Flair's "documentary." Animal and Flair are talking about the Midajah situation. Flair says Animal needs to "interrogate DDP and Dustin Rhodes as only you can do." After Animal leaves, Flair says to Buff if it's anybody, it's Animal. Who cares?
"Sugar" Shane Helms vs. Kwee Wee.
- Man, I wouldn't want to be put in a vertebreaker. That move is so easy to screw up. I think I'll pass on that one.
- Ouch. You can see a lot of empty chairs six and seven rows into the crowd.
- Suplex by Kwee Wee, whom Tenay mistakenly calls "Kiwi." Schiavone then proceeds to do the same.
- This match blows.
- I would describe it, but nothing's happening!!!! Some punches and kicks, but that's it.
- Scoop slam by Kwee Wee. Two count before Helms kicks out.
- Helms hits an arm drag that sends Kwee Wee outside the ring. Helms with a baseball slide drop kick. Helms then comes off the top with a cross body on Kwee Wee.
- Back in the ring, Helms hits a cross body off the top rope.
- Now Kwee Wee slams Helms down face first. Helms then reverses into a Northern Lights suplex for a two count.
- Helms hits the Sugar Smack (super kick), and then Kwee Wee reverses out of the vertebreaker into a sunset flip. Two count.
- Scoop slam by Kwee Wee and he goes up top and misses a leg drop.
- Helms hits the vertebreaker and it's over.
- YOUR WINNER : "Sugar" Shane Helms via the vertebreaker.
- Chavo comes to the ring and attacks Helms, who then hits a mule kick on Chavo. Chavo is on the apron and Helms hits a Sugar Smack to knock Chavo out of the ring.
Replay of moments ago, when Palumbo and O'Haire chase Totally Buff from ringside.
Disqo and "Above Average" Mike Sanders vs. Konnan and Hugh Morrus
- I still say Mike Sanders has the coolest entrance music in WCW, but it's cut off by Gonad's music.
- I also still say that Morrus has tremendous potential that WCW is not using. I don't know how either, but there's something there.
- It'll be Disqo and Morrus right off the bat after a quick tag by Sanders.
- Morrus and Sanders are now fighting in the ring (he was tagged in again) as Disqo and Konnan go at it on the floor.
- Now Konnan and Disqo are in the ring. Another crowd shot. I guess Konnan missed a move.
- Konnan goes out and Morrus attacks Disqo as Konnan gets worked over by Sanders outside the ring. Sanders rolls Konnan, the legal man, into the ring. Now Disqo tags in Sanders.
- Disqo comes back in, as Konnan is down. Tenay says that Konnan and Morrus were a tag team as members of the Dungeon of Doom. Schiavone seems floored by the reference to the Dungeon of Doom.
- Nothing's going on in the ring and Tony is still talking about the Dungeon of Doom reference. I'm getting a dip.
- OK, looks like we have hot tags to Disqo and Hugh Morrus.
- I've never seen a match with this many more tags than moves.
- Let's see, Morrus is up for the No Laughing Matter and hits it. Konnan puts the Tequila Sunrise on Disqo and it's over.
- YOUR WINNERS: Konnan and Hugh Morrus via the No Laughing Matter and Tequila Sunrise.
- That sucked. Where's Charles Nelson Reilly when you need him?
- Oh wait, it's not over. Mike Awesome and Lance Storm come out to punk Konnan and Hugh Morrus as we go to commercial.
If I see that stupid promo for Greed once more, I'm gonna puke.
Backstage, Buff has the camera. He opens the dressing room door, and Animal is laid out. The writing on the wall (literally) says "It wasn't him" with an arrow pointing toward Animal.
Montage of DDP and Scott Steiner.
Diamond Dallas Page and Dustin Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett and Rick "Main Event" Steiner
- Next on Ripley's Believe It Or Not: "Rick Steiner in two main events in the same week." I don't know about y'all, but I don't think that show's the same with Superman (Dean Cain) hosting. You can't beat Jack Palance saying "believe it....or not" and looking like he was about to take a dump at any time.
- Steiner takes his time getting to the ring. What a nice guy. He stops along the way to talk to some fans. Oops, they don't look too happy about it.
- What happened to tag teams coming in together? All four men come to the ring with separate entrance music.
- DDP and Rhodes come to the ring and promptly chase the heels out.
- It will be DDP and Rick Steiner to start.
- Hey Nick Patrick is back as the referee!!!! He did shave off the trademark moustache, though. Looks like he's lost a little of that gut he had during his "nWo heel referee" days.
- Steiner with a flying Steinerline off the ropes.
- Steiner tags Jarrett in, and DDP rolls him up with a sunset flip, which Steiner breaks up.
- Steiner is tagged back in, and works over DDP.
- What's left of the crowd starts a "DDP" chant.
- Jarrett comes in to work over DDP. Some punches and a clothesline and Steiner comes back in the ring.
- DDP hits a jawbreaker on Steiner.
- Now Jarrett is back in, and Page finally gets over to the corner to tag Rhodes. Nick Patrick doesn't see it though, of course.
- DDP is in the wrong corner, now, and is fighting back against both men. Page hits a clothesline on Rick Steiner.
- Hot tags to Jarrett and Rhodes. Rhodes comes in like a house a-fire. Steiner comes in to clothesline Rhodes but hits Nick Patrick instead.
- Steiner hits a power slam on Rhodes, and Ric Flair comes in to count it. DDP breaks it up though. Flair, Steiner, and DDP fight to the outside as Jarrett retrieves the guitar. He hits Rhodes with it, then hits Rhodes with the Stroke. Patrick wakes up (miraculously) and it's over.
- YOUR WINNER: Jeff Jarrett and Rick Steiner via the Stroke.
- Here come Palumbo, O'Haire, Konnan and Hugh Morrus to fight off the heels (Luger and Buff come out too). Page tells Flair to tell Steiner he's still standing, and he'll see Steiner at the pay per view as we fade to black.
The Good: Well, Jason Jett looked OK, as long as he stops naming every move. Kidman and Rey Misterio worked hard. At least they're getting some continuity on the Midajah attack angle.
The Bad: The show was pretty boring. It still did not get me to want to order the pay per view. I thought that's what the last show before a pay per view is supposed to get you to do.
The Ugly: Stasiak-Reno was an ugly match. No question about it.
I'm out.

WCW Thunder - Wednesday, 3/14/2001

By Big Mike

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