WCW Thunder - Wednesday, September 20, 2000

By King Leo of King Leo's Wrestling Palace

Hello and welcome to the DDT Digest Thunder report. I'm your host King Leo and as usual I'll be guiding you through two hours of sports entertainment mixed with an occasional bit of professional wrestling.
I've been thinking about doing a section of my page on the greatest wrestling moments. I'd appreciate any ideas you may have as to what those greatest moments are.
Trivia Question: What was the name of the 1994 tournament held between Ric Flair and Lord Steven Regal? (answer at end of report)
Speaking of Regal, I thought his return on RAW was priceless. It reminded me of one of those angles from the early '90's that was so dumb that it actually worked. Whoever came up with the idea needs to write all wrestling programming. Table manners? That's hilarious.
In case you didn't watch Fall Brawl like I didn't or Nitro like I didn't, Hacksaw Jim Duggan turned heel by joining the Great Satan itself, Canada. Canada?!

That's one of those swerves that everyone sees coming, so it's not really a "swerve," but more of a "see something in the road a mile away so you calmly change lanes and go around it." In fact, I don't remember the last time that I didn't figure out a swerve in WCW well before it happened.
I've been to Canada twice on purpose and once accidentally and happen to think that the Calgary, Alberta, Canada area is once of the nicest places I've been. I only met one unpleasant Canadian my whole time there (the three visits there took about five days total). Does that make me a heel?

Vincent (no, not that Vincent) took the time to inform me that he'd pick Winky the Crow over the Bubble Yum Duck in a fight because The Winkster uses psychic kung fu.

I wouldn't put it beyond WCW to get Winky the Crow involved in some kind of angle. I can just imagine it: Winky the Crow and The Cat vs. Disqo and Disqo Duck.
Don't laugh. I'm dead serious. What? Don't believe me? OK. Chucky!!!! Robocop!!!!!! David Arquette former WCW World Heavyweight champion!!!!! Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Thunder is a TBS original series even though calling it "original" is really pushing it.
Let's start with Nitro highlights.
Thunder is coming to us via tape delay from Erie, Pennsylvania this week because it's just not worth it for WCW to do two or three live shows a week.

Here ~~come the Road Warriors!~~ comes Vince Russo and ~~power plant jobbers~~ goons.

Russo's got paint below his eyes.
Russo says it's a very emotional night because he only has five days until he becomes World Champion.
Stevie Ray says he only has five minutes before he throws up or something like that.
Russo calls Booker T a street thug.
Russo says that Booker T has the night off because Russo will have the home field advantage come Nitro.
Russo says he was in the Power Plant "yesterday" for 45 minutes.

It's the magical Thunder yesterday, or at least it must appear that way to the fans at the arena.

Russo says that tonight "in this very ring" he will have a warm-up match.
Russo calls out Stevie Ray.
Our Patron Saint approaches the ring, then climbs on the apron when Russo says he doesn't want to see Stevie tonight.
Tenay says that if Stevie leaves, it's more mic time for the rest of the announcers.
Cut to the back and Scott Steiner and Jeff Jarrett are arriving.
Stevie Ray starts to leave and Russo tells him he can't use the ramp, but has to go around.
Russo cuts a promo on Booker and Scott Steiner and Midajah come out followed by Jeff Jarrett and his trusty guitar.
Steiner nails the Power Plant jobber security guards with his pipe and throws everyone out.
Russo gets sprayed with mace.
Steiner wants an explanation to why Russo didn't allow him to get the title shot on Monday.
Jarrett wants his title shot too.
Russo loves Steiner and Jarrett.
Russo tries to get Jarrett and Steiner to forget about Monday's doing by setting up a three way dance for tonight against Sting.
Russo says if Steiner and Jarrett can beat Sting, they'll be getting title shots from "now to kingdom come."
Russo says that he made Steiner and Jarrett and can break Steiner and Jarrett.
Russo runs out but our World Champion stops him.
Sting and Booker beat on Steiner and Jarrett.
A knock comes at my door and an acquaintance of mine asks if he can watch too. I can't deny a fellow wrestling fan, so it's me and Einar here.
I'm pretty sure that Sting and Booker were brawling with the members of the group that's not the nWo. Nothing special there.

We come back from break and Jeremy Borash is substituting for Stevie Ray.

Apparently Borash is from New York to kiss up from Vince Russo, but either he's lying or he comes from the part of New York that's in Minnesota.

There's a "shoot interview" with Stacy Keibler tonight.
We can subscribe to WCW magazine if we want to.

Match #1: Jung Dragons vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Out come the Jung Dragons, with Leia Meow.
The announcers talk about the Internet speculation that doesn't exist that Howard Stern's Merry Band of Perverts will judge the Miss WCW contest.
Here come Mark Jindrak, Sean O'Haire, and Mike Sanders.
Sanders and Kaz Hayashi start out. They fight, and Yung Yang tags in.
O'Haire tags in.
Yang goes for a sunset flip, but O'Haire doesn't go down.
Jindrak tags in and Yang reverses some moves with a nice flying headscissors.
Jindrak with a Samoan drop.
O'Haire tags in and hits the seanton bomb, but Jamie-San comes in for the save with a guillotine legdrop to the back of the head!
Jamie-San tags in and nails a double DDT on Jindrak and O'Haire.
Jindrak with a sitout powerbomb.
Sanders tags in. I didn't mention this, but Sanders joined the Three Musketeers on commentary for a while until he noticed that his partners were in trouble.
Jamie-San with a reverse Russian legsweep.
O'Haire throws Jamie onto the Safety Rail of Pain
They throw Sanders over the ropes, and Sanders nails him with a powerslam in mid-flight.
Miss Meow nails Jamie-San outside the ring.
Apparently it's discipline time.
Then, Meow gets on the top rope and hits Sanders with the Bombs Away for the three count.
Apparently, the referee thinks all Asians look the same, because he counts the three and gives the Dragons the win.
Your Winners: ~~Kaientai~~ Jung Dragons.
Yep. You read right. Leia Meow got the pin.
The Natural Born Jobbers lose again.

Disqo and The Cat are in the back.

Disqo says that the only reason he lost in five seconds on Nitro was because Miller pulled tights.
Disqo asks if Miss Jones likes his duck. She says no. Disqo tells her to have a feel and she throws it to the ground.
Russo is in back with an African American who I don't recognize and tells him to sell for him. The jobber dons a mask. Nothing to do with the rest of the segment.

I only mention his race because it comes into play a little later.

Disqo is with the Filthy Animals again and suggests that Rey Misterio Jr. and Juvi wrestle tonight with the winner becoming number one contender to Elix Skipper's 100 Kilos and Under Title. Also, he'll bring Disqo Duck to ringside.
Rey, Konnan, and Juvi all say stuff that gets bleeped so we don't know what they said.

Mike Awesome is out for the Lava Lamp Lounge.

He's "not very happy" that the set gets trashed every week.
Mike Awesome's not a very happy man about anything.
Awesome's guests tonight are the Miss WCW competitors.
That's sure to suck big time.
He asks what to expect on Nitro.
First off he offers Torrie a mic, but Major Gunns already has one and starts to talk.
Then there's some problems with the audio.
They argue for a while and it looks like Jerry Springer.
Some music plays and Chae and Chiquita come out and say stuff.
The ladies trash the set and Awesome says at least he has some of the stuff left.
I expect better from Mike Awesome.

Up next, Russo vs. Jobber.

Einar reminds me that we never resolved the brain surgery thing. In fact, I don't think they've even mentioned it since.

Scheme Gene is with Scott Steiner.

Steiner says that he destroyed Goldberg, he destroyed Booker T, and will destroy Sting.

"Match" #2: Vince Russo vs. The Masked Heel

Here comes Vince Russo. Again.
There will be a battle royal on Monday for the vacant tag titles. Kronik and The Filthy Animals, specifically Rey and Juvi, are the first teams named.
The Masked Heel comes out to Booker's "Leave it to Beaver" music.

The Masked Heel led the Part's Unknown Olympic team to 28 gold medals in weightlifting and wrestling. That's what Pamela Paulshock says at least.

Russo gets in some chops.
Russo hits Masked Jobber with a big boot, then rips of his T-shirt a la . . . that one guy.
The Heel gets up and no-sells everything a la . . . that one guy.
I bet it's Stevie Ray under the mask.
Russo whispers something into the Heel's ear.
Russo turns around and the Heel removes his mask.
Hey! I was right. It's Stevie Ray with our first Swerve of the night.
Stevie hits Russo with the slapjack.
Then he says that the only reason he doesn't beat Russo's face in is because he wants Booker to recognize him on Monday.
Your Winner: No contest, but Stevie Ray's music plays.

Russo is in back with Kronik.

Russo says that Kronik will destroy Stevie Ray tonight.

The Filthy Animals are in back, too.

They sure do hang out a lot.
They're arguing about Disqo.
Konnan tells Rey and Juvi to go at it tonight and bring the Cruiserweight title home to the Animals.

Match #3: Torrie Wilson vs. Paisley.

Shane Douglas comes out with Torrie.
Jindrak and O'Haire and the Jung Dragons are in the tag team battle royal too.
There's going to be a bikini contest on Nitro.

And it's going to end with clothes being ripped off and probably some gratuitous violence.
Well, at least Mae Young isn't going to be involved (knock on wood.)

Kwee Wee comes out and easily triples the charisma level in the arena, fans included.
For the love of Gardetto's Snack Mix!! It's not Kwee Wee vs. Douglas, it's . . . Torrie vs. Paisley.
Long story short alert.
If you care, Paisley got the pin with a rollup into a bridge.
So, for Crippler, Your Winner: Paisley.
Post match, Douglas nails Paisley with the crappiest move in sports entertainment, the Franchizer.
Tygress runs out to save the ladies and Douglas grabs her.
Konnan saves Tygress.
I wonder if Konnan's been cleared to wrestle. It's been so long since I've seen him that I don't remember if he's a good wrestler or not.

Russo is in back with Mike Sanders.

Hatching up some evil plot, no doubt.

You can get a subscription to WCW Magazine if you want to.

Or just do what I do and read it in a book store.

Here comes the greatest man in the whole world next to Steven Regal (Lance Storm.) He's with Jim Duggan, who looks like Carl Oulette, and Elix Skipper.

Lance Storm grabs the mic and glares like only he can.
Lance says "Can I be serious for a minute" and Schiavone surprisingly doesn't say "You're always serious."
Storm's trying to convert us to Canadianism.

Sounds good. Sign me up.

Duggan gets the mic.

We forced Jim Duggan to join Canada.

Duggan's apparently going to trash the flag.
But the Misfits come out to save it.
Team Canada already has weapons, so they pretty much dominate until Morrus runs into the ring.
Morrus grabs the flag and tries to save it, but Duggan hits him with the 2x4.
Morrus shields the flag with his body.
Team Canada beats on General Rection, who is called a "great American" by one of the announcers.

Mike Sanders gets into a forklift and parks it in front of Booker T's locker room.

He went maybe 10 feet. Or 50-75 feet if you're Jim Ross.
Only Sanders is qualified to operate a forklift I guess.

Mene Gene is in back with Jeff Jarrett.

Mene Gene swears again.
Jarrett says he should get the title shot.
Jarrett "guaran-damn-tees" something.

Thunder is brought to us by Macho Man in a straight jacket, the Great Freezer O'Fire, AOL, Hot Pockets, Tootsie stuff, and some .com company.

Match #4: Stevie Ray vs. Kronik in a handicap match.

Stevie Ray comes out still wearing his "Masked Heel" shirt.
The Harris Bros and Cajun & Loco are in the battle royal as well.
The announcers tell us that it's not a match, it's a confrontation.
OK, so maybe it is a match, since we've got a ref.
Stevie Ray has his way with Clark for a while, Clark gets his way.
Adams tags in.
Adams whips Stevie into the rope and Clark nails him in the back.
There's a really awkward series of moves where everybody basically screws up and doesn't sell things right and it's in slow motion.
Some stuff happens, then Stevie grabs the slapjack.
Adams come from behind with the full-nelson slam.
Kronik is too sportsmanlike to use the slapjack, so they throw it out and get a chair instead.
Kronik sets up the chair and give the sign for the High Time. Then they kick the chair out of the way and hit their move.
Clark gets the pin.
Your winner: Kronik via pinfall.
If it were my gimmick and I didn't think Aldo could whip my butt, I'd give this match a crying Indian.

In the back, Forklift is blocking Booker's door and Booker's inside.

Time for the Motorsports report.

They're talking to some guy with a mullet.
He's showing us their equipment, which includes a baseball bat.

He stills my joke by saying that they use it in fights with other teams.

It's Russo again with Kronik again.

Russo's angry with Kronik for not destroying Stevie Ray.

Mentioning that Meineke sponsors the closed captioning gives us an excuse to see the Nitro Girls.

Match #5: Rey Misterio Jr. vs. Juventud Guerrera for a Cruiserweight title shot.

There's no chance that I'm going to be able to follow this match, so I'm recording it.
The Filthy Animals (sans Disqo) come out.
Russo will be taking calls on the post-show at WCW.com.

OK, so I know the only one who's actually read this before the show is me.

Rey and Juvi feel each other out for a moment
Cool reversals and things resulting in a powerslam by Rey.
They trade monkey flips.
They sure do hold hands a lot.
Juvi with a move invented by Gory Guerrero. It was kind of a torture rack move. Could it have been the famous Gory Special (yes, that's a request for somebody who knows to tell me)?
Juvi with a couple of chops.
Juvi goes for a splash into the corner and Rey moves out of the way.
Rey goes for a move into the corner and Juvi counters with an elbow.
Juvi reverses a move into a cradle and gets a two count.
They both go down with a double clothesline.
Referee Charles Robinson gets to five on the double count.
Juvi hits a springboard missile dropkick that knocks Rey outside!

Actually Rey kind of has to roll out, but we'll forgive him just this once.

Juvi nails Rey with a diving cross body.
Rey walks around outside trying to recover and Juvi executes a pescado (that's a fish for those who don't speak Spanish).

It's also a cross body over the top rope.

Back in the ring, Juvi gets an Irish whip reversed, Rey follows through going for a splash or something, then Juvi counters with a headscissors, but Rey counters with a powerbomb!
Rey hits the Bronco Buster.
Juvi hits eight punches in the turnbuckle, but the crowd doesn't count along.
Then Juvi hits a vertical suplex for a two count.
Juvi with a variation on the People's Elbow, but he just bounces off one rope instead of crossing the ring.
Juvi's trying to recover or something and Misterio hits him with a flying headscissors.
Juvi climbs out and Rey hits him with a headscissor variation.
Back in the ring, Misterio goes for a springboard hurricanrana that Guerrera counters with a powerbomb.
That gets Juvi a two count.
Then Juvi hits a springboard splash for another two count.
Juvi whips Rey into the ropes, but Misterio slides under.
Then Misterio gets Juvi into a waistlock which is reversed.
I guess I should mention that Konnan's on commentary and notes that Disqo is no longer part of the Filthy Animals. They say that the duck can stay because it's more charismatic.
Juvi fights his way out of the waistlock, Rey reverses it, goes for a pumphandle . . . something that we don't see because Juvi flips out of it. Then Rey bridges Juvi for two.
Rey goes for an Asai moonsault that Juventud counters into the Juvi Driver for two.
Then Juvi goes for a powerbomb that Misterio reverses like Kidman does, but without the bulldog thing.
Rey hits a powerbomb for two, then Juvi reverses the pin for the three count.
Your winner: Juventud Guerrera. And since I recorded it, I can tell you that he won in about 8:22.
Post-match, Disqo comes out and the Filthy Animals join in beating him up.
It was a good reminder of why I love wrestling.
It wasn't the greatest match I've seen, but it was up there in the matches that I'm not against.
RIP WCW Lucha. We hardly knew you.

Mene Gene's in back with Sting.

Sting's talking smack about Jarrett and Steiner.

Match #6: 3 Count vs. Harris Brothers in a handicap match

Look. It's 3 Count.
Sid Vicious is making an appearance somewhere sometime.
3 Count will be in the battle royal Monday along with the ICP.
3 Count is singing a new song.
I'm recording this match too because it's probably going to be good unless . . .
Crap! The Harris Brothers.
I honestly stopped my VCR right when I saw that.
Not too much actual wrestling going on, and I can't tell the Harris Brothers apart.
Wait, They tell me that Big Ron is letting his hair grow out.

I hope they grow their hair out and become the Blu Brothers again.

Or maybe not.

The Harrises hit Shane Moore with the H-Bomb.
Don is looking for something under the ring and takes a really long time finding it.
Ron doesn't go for the pin for some reason.
Don finally finds what he's looking for, but Kronik comes out for the save.
Then the Natural Born Thrillers.
Then pretty much everyone and his dog.
Your Winner: No contest.

Mike Tenay is talking to Stacy Kiebler.

Tenay talks about what happened a couple of weeks ago at the wedding.
Stacy apologizes to and says she loves David.
Tenay acts like a real idiot and basically accuses Miss Hancock of sleeping with, well, basically as many people as there were who ran in on the last match.
He asks if we can count them on one hand or two.
Kiebler says there was only one.
Tenay forgets the storyline and asks her how she could sleep with another guy when she was engaged.
Stacy won't say who it was.
At the end of the interview, Tenay looks into the camera and says sarcastically, "Boy, she'll make a great mother."
My guess is that they won't know who the father really is for quite some time, they'll get Ole Anderson to do the voice of the father, then they'll finally decide it's really Ric Flair just to bring it to an end.

Russo joins the broadcasters. He says he's going to make big announcement during the main event.
And I should probably also mention that at some point Some Guy moved the forklift. It was probably about now.

Match #7: Scott Steiner vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Sting

Big Poppa Pump causes seizures in some individuals by making his entrance.
Steiner cuts the music and for a change talks about beating Goldberg and his future opponent Booker T. He then insults Booker's mother.
Jeff Jarrett (with Guitar) comes out.
Then Sting comes out.
Match starts and all three men brawl.
Sting hits Steiner with a bulldog and an atomic drop.
Sting whips Steiner into the corner then goes to whip Jarrett into Steiner, but Jarrett reverses it.
Steiner hits a sweet belly-to-belly suplex.
The title match on Nitro is going to be a caged heat match sayeth Vinnie Ru.
Steiner and Jarrett take Sting over the ropes with a double clothesline.
Booker T comes out with Sting makeup and tights.

At least it's not the G.I. Bro makeup and tights.

Booker hits Jarrett and Steiner with a Stinger splash.
The ref doesn't really notice what's going on because with the makeup and Sting tights, Booker and Sting look nothing alike.
Booker Sting nails Double J with an ax kick and does the SPINNEROONI, SPINNEROONI, THE WORLD CHAMP WITH A SPINNEROONI.
Then Jarrett gets the Scorpion Deathlock but Russo comes in. Sting releases the hold to get Russo into the Deathlock when Jarrett comes from behind with the guitar.
And for some reason, even with blatant interference by Booker T, the referee calls for the bell.
Your winner: I guess Sting via disqualification.
Booker goes for the Bookend, but Steiner comes from behind with the pipe.
Jarrett and Steiner beat down Sting and Booker, culminating in Jarrett inflicting the figure four leglock upon Sting while Steiner places Booker in the Steiner Recliner.
Your Winner: No contest.

I don't have a whole lot to say except what's in the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly except thanks to everyone for reading my report and for giving me feedback. I appreciate it.
Running a last spell check before I submit the report I note that there are many words in wrestling that don't have much application in the real world.

The Good: Rey vs. Juvi was an excellent match. Kwee Wee was back, but unfortunately didn't get to do much.

The Bad: Most of the matches were WAY overbooked. Sure overbooking has its place, but it's not in every main event.

The Ugly: That horrible exchange of moves between Kronik and Stevie Ray.

Trivia Answer: The Marquis of Queensbury cup.

WCW Thunder - Wednesday, September 20, 2000

By King Leo of King Leo's Wrestling Palace

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