WCW Monday Nitro - Monday, 08/23/99

WCW Monday Nitro - Monday, 08/23/99

Las Vegas, NV

By Wade

Our patron saint

No pre-show report this week. I was running late at work, and not feeling great to boot.
We look back at Sid's mission to crush cruiserweights, and other fun stuff from last week.
And we're live from Las Vegas, Nevada, with WCW Monday Nitro.
KISS Promo - I have a feeling that it's going to be a long night.
- Heenan confuses Gene Simmons with Richard Simmons
- Tony talks about a new WCW president being crowned - have they mentioned this recently?
Match 1: Mikey Whipwreck vs. Chase Tatum
- Let's see - there's a cruiserweight, must be a Sid run-in.
- His opponent - former No Limit Soldier Chase Tatum.
- Tatum powers Mikey down to start.
- Mikey with a flurry to come back.
- Tatum levels Mikey with a clothesline, and pounds on him.
- HORRIBLE dropkick by Tatum. It was Wattsian in its suck.
- Mikey shows Chase how to land a dropkick.
- Tatum reverses a suplex.
- The crowd reacts as F***ng Sid comes down the aisle.
- Sigh.
- Tony says that Sid's win streak is now up to 66, meaning he's wrestled 11 times in the past week.
- Sid powerbombs both men as Charles Robinson holds up a "Sid 66-0 the man for the millennium" sign.
- Sid covers Whipwreck for a pin. Robinson pulls out a 67-0 sign.
- Sid covers Tatum. Robinson pulls out a 68-0 sign.
- Sid gets on the mic.
- He mocks Goldberg.
- Sid rambles a bit more.
Billy Kidman runs into Kimberly in the back
- Kidman apologizes if he offended Kim.
- Kim says it's all good, and she's going to try to calm DDP down.
Goldberg comes into the arena - he finds DDP beating up Kidman
- Goldberg and the Triad have a standoff.
The Triad comes out for an interview
- Kanyon asks the question. Big "Everybody" response.
- Standard Triad interview.
- DDP brings up Kanyon training him, and DDP getting him into the business.
- DDP says that Kidman doesn't even breathe the same air as Kimberly.
- DDP challenges Goldberg for a match tonight.
Sting makes his way to the ring
- Sting winks at the camera.
- Tony threatens us with Kiss' wrestler tonight.
- Sting: "Stizing in da hizous."
- Sting talks about his title shot.
- Lex Luger's music comes on, and Luger makes his way down the aisle.
- Sting looks a little shocked, but he and Luger hug when Luger gets to the ring.
- The crowd chants for Luger.
- Luger says he's here to show support for Sting.
- Luger calls Sting the true franchise of WCW.
- Luger says he has a bad feeling about Hollywood Hogan.
- Luger brings up Hogan's sudden desire to ally himself with Goldberg and Sting.
- Luger tells Sting not to trust Hogan.
- There's weird audio feedback coming through the speakers.
- Sting says he's going to take Hogan on for the title, and that's all there is.
- Luger wishes Sting the best.
Mike Tenay is outside the hotel
- Eric Bischoff pulls up in a Hummer. Bischoff's the hummer driver!
- Eric the Grey doesn't know about any rumors about him becoming President.
- Bischoff: "You got these rumors off the Internet? That's the Internet for you."
Match 2: Earnest Miller (w/Sonny Oono) vs. Buff Bagwell
- Oono handcuffs the magic briefcase to his wrist.
- Why doesn't Sid ever interrupt Kitty matches?
- Kitty talks about all the people he's beaten.
- Kitty claims to have beaten Buff Bagwell at the PPV.
- Kitty challenges Buff again.
- Buff makes his way out.
- Tony talks about WCW Mayhem coming out in a month.
- Kitty shoulderblocks Buff down.
- Kitty with a kick to the gut.
- Buff reverses a hiptoss, and slams Kitty.
- A patented Bagwell dropkick sends Kitty to the floor.
- Kitty comes back in and floors Bagwell with a round kick.
- Kitty slams Buff, and drops a moonwalk elbow.
- Kitty with another slam, but Buff avoids another moonwalk elbow.
- Buff comes back, a weak kick to the gut, and a swinging neckbreaker.
- Buff off the ropes with a splash for two.
- Low blow from Kitty.
- Kitty tosses Buff to the floor.
- Oono gets his licks in.
- Lex Luger comes out, and scares Oono off.
- Buff comes back in the ring, and hits the Blockbuster on a distracted Kitty for the win.
- Of course, the camera is focused on Oono walking around the ring, so we completely miss the finish. Nice production work, guys.
New promo for Berlyn.
DJ Ran is still up in my damn area.
The Nitro Girls show that the air conditioning is on in the arena.
Match 3: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Bill Goldberg
- DDP makes his way out.
- He stalls a bit, because it's 15 minutes before 9.
- Kanyon runs down with DDP.
- Page does some mic work running down Goldberg and the crowd.
- "Crush 'Em" brings out Goldberg
- Bigelow runs down behind Goldberg with a big metal cylinder.
- Kanyon whips Page into Goldberg in the corner for an avalanche clothesline.
- Page goes to whip Kanyon for the same move, but Goldberg comes out of the corner with a VICIOUS spear.
- Bigelow runs down to protect Page, but gets speared, too.
- DDP runs through the crowd to escape Goldberg.
- Goldberg challenges Page for next week in Long Island.
We're going to get a new video from the West Texas Rednecks.
- It's new lyrics to Jeff Jarrett's old theme music.
- Interesting. But not funny.
We see the most idiotic Nitro party ever.
- Heenan: "They even like WCW in day care centers!"
Match 4: Juventud Guerrera vs. WCW World Cruiserweight Champion Lenny Lane (w/Lodi)
- Guess Sid'll be coming back out.
- His opponent - Lodi, along with WCW Cruiserweight Champion Lenny Lane.
- Actually, it's Lenny wrestling.
- Lenny crawls around on all fours.
- Lenny applauds as Juvi plays to the crowd.
- Juvi slaps both Lenny and Lodi.
- Juvi attacks to start the match.
- Lenny holds onto a go-behind waistlock for a while, until Juvi hits a low blow.
- Lodi full-nelsons Juvi for Lenny to attack, but Juvi escapes.
- Juvi vaults onto Lodi.
- Lenny, though, hits a corkscrew plancha from the top onto Juvi on the floor.
- Lenny slams Juvi, skips around the ring twirling his pigtails, and covers for two.
- Lenny applies a chinlock.
- Juvi's tights: "Baby Juice"
- Lenny with two shoulderbreakers and a powerslam.
- Lenny with a frontrake and a backrake.
- Lenny tosses Juvi to the floor, where Lodi gets his licks in.
- Juvi turns a suplex into a small package for a near-fall.
- Chant: "You are gay."
- Lenny with a Ligerbomb for two.
- Lenny and Lodi celebrate.
- Crowd: "Faggot"
- Juvi avoids a Lenny corner charge.
- Juvi with ten punches in the corner, and the JuviDriver motion in Lenny's face.
- Juvi goes up top, Lenny catches him, but Juvi escapes for a top-rope powerbomb.
- Juvi gets the JuviDriver, and goes up top as F***ing Sid gets in the ring.
- Juvi dives off, and Sid catches him with a powerbomb.
- Lodi and Lenny get ones too.
- Charles Robinson is apparently both a ref and scorekeeper.
- F*** you, WCW©.
- Sid covers all three men.
- F*** you, WCW©.
- Sid gets even more mic time.
- Cubs Fan - WCW's new motto: "If we could come to your house and switch your remote to USA for you, we would."
Curt Hennig and the Rednecks come out to perform their new song
- Hennig talks smack about Kiss.
- Hennig says that Kiss can't even stay up all night, much less rock and roll all night.
- They then proceed to do their song. And nothing else happens.
- I felt my soul leave my body during that little ditty.
Nitro Girls.
Match 5: Brian Knobbs, Hugh Morrus, and Barbarian (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Dean Malenko, Shane Douglas, and Perry Saturn
- ³/₄ of the First Family of Flab make their way out.
- Their opponents: ³/₄ of the Revolution.
- Malenko starts off against Morrus.
- Malenko with a top-rope bodypress, and a dropkick.
- Douglas tags in for a double-elbow.
- Barbarian tags in.
- Douglas pounds on Barbarian in the corner, and gets shoved away a couple of times.
- Barbie eats boot on a corner charge, the Douglas connects with a flying clothesline.
- Malenko and Knobbs tag in.
- The Family beats on Malenko.
- Malenko continues to absorb punishment from the Family.
- Malenko gets a foot up when Knobbs tries his second-rope splash.
- Saturn tags in.
- Saturn cleans house.
- Saturn superkicks Knobbs, but Morrus breaks the pin!
- Saturn T-bones Knobbs, and signals for the DVD.
- Rick Steiner runs down, and delivers the SBoD to Saturn.
- Knobbs delivers a splash, and covers for the pin.
- Benoit runs down.
- Benoit gets on the mic, and challenges Steiner. He offers a shot at the US belt.
- Steiner accepts.
Berlyn promo.
Match 6: Insane Clown Posse (w/Vampiro) vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. and Billy Kidman
- Tony has the gall to talk about how well WCW has built its Cruiserweight division up. Especially since they've killed it over the last six months or so.
- Shaggy 2 Dope and Kidman start out.
- Kidman with a slam, and a dropkick, and Shaggy gets clotheslined over the top rope.
- Shaggy gets whipped into the guardrail.
- Rey tags in with a slingshot springboard legdrop.
- Shaggy gets a clothesline to end the carnage.
- Violent J tags in, as does Kidman.
- Rey hits an Asai moonsault on J.
- J with a clothesline of his own.
- J suplexes Kidman, and Shaggy drops an elbow.
- Kidman levels Shaggy with the rope-bounce clothesline.
- Rey back in with a springboard dropkick.
- Rey with a Bronco Buster.
- J comes in to stomp Rey.
- J press-slams Rey into Shaggy's knees for a gutbuster.
- Shaggy goes up top, and hits a guillotine legdrop. Kidman breaks the pin.
- Kidman whips Rey, who flips over the top onto J.
- Kidman goes up top for the Shooting Star Press, but Vampiro shoves him off.
- Kidman reverses a whip, sending Shaggy and Vampiro into each other.
- Kidman then covers Shaggy for the pin.
- The heels attack after the bell, and Vampiro plants Kidman with a Rock Bottom.
- Eddy Guerrero runs out for the save, and challenges Vampiro.
Gene calls out Hulk Hogan
- Hogan gimps to the ring.
- Hogan says that Luger shouldn't doubt him.
- Hogan goes on a tangent about his son.
- Blah blah train, say a prayer, kick Sting's ass.
Match 7: WCW World Television Champion Rick Steiner vs. WCW US Heavyweight Champion Chris Benoit
- Rick Steiner makes his way down.
- Steiner doesn't even carry the TV belt with him anymore.
- The US champ makes his way down.
- They brawl immediately at the bell.
- Steiner gets the advantage.
- Benoit with a German suplex out of nowhere for two.
- Benoit kicks Steiner down against the ropes.
- Steiner catches Benoit in mid-air for a suplex.
- Steiner drops an elbow for two.
- Steiner continues to work Benoit over.
- Charles Robinson is the referee, if that comes into play.
- Benoit goes to the apron, sends Steiner to the turnbuckle, but Steiner catches him up top and runs him gut-first into the opposite corner.
- Steiner continues the advantage on the floor.
- Steiner brings Benoit back into the ring.
- Benoit gets his boots up on a corner charge, spins Steiner around, and hits the triple German suplex.
- The thumb goes across the throat.
- Benoit goes up top.
- Steiner pulls Robinson between the diving headbutt and himself.
- Steiner goes outside, and gets the US belt.
- Perry Saturn runs in to beat on Steiner.
- Sid runs in and chokeslams Saturn.
- Hey, guess what? F*** you, WCW©.
- Sid and Steiner stuff-powerbomb Saturn.
- Benoit gets up and chases the heels away with the US belt.
- Benoit gets on the mic and rants about the purpose of the Revolution.
- Benoit reiterates the challenge for Benoit and Saturn vs. Sid and Steiner on Thunder this week.
Match 8: Barry Windham and Kendall Windham vs. WCW World Tag Team Champions Harlem Heat
- We get to hear the Rednecks song for the third time tonight, as Barry and Kendall Windham will represent the Rednecks.
- Their opponents - the tag champs!
- Stevie Ray informs us that he hates Fruit Booties.
- Booker T and Kendall start out.
- Booker armdrags Kendall.
- Booker with a massive flying forearm, and Stevie Ray tags in.
- Double back-elbow from the heat.
- Kendall avoids an elbowdrop.
- Barry tags in with a DDT on Stevie.
- Stevie slams Barry.
- Booker comes in to beat on Barry.
- Stevie tags in, and becomes the Fruit Booty in Peril.
- Stevie comes back with a double-clothesline on the Windhams.
- Spinning kick from Booker on Kendall.
- The other Rednecks try to interfere, but it's all for naught.
- Booker hits the Missile Dropkick on Kendall, but the ref is distracted.
- Booker goes to check on the referee.
- Curt Hennig comes in, and brains Booker in the back of the head with the cowbell.
- Kendall covers Booker.
- The ref slowly comes back in. One...two....THREE????
- Oh my....the Windham brothers are the NEW World Tag Team champions!
- That was....interesting booking.
Match 9: Vampiro vs. Eddy Guerrero
- Vampiro comes out for his challenge match.
- His opponent - Eddy Guerrero.
- Vampiro attacks as soon as Eddy enters the ring.
- Vampiro with an avalanche clothesline, and a HUGE overhead belly-to-belly.
- Eddy avoids another avalanche, and beats on Vampiro in the corner.
- Vampiro drops to his knees, and Eddy dropkicks him over backward.
- Spinning back-elbow from Eddy.
- Eddy hits a snap-suplex.
- Vampiro with a monkey flip, but Eddy sends him over the top.
- Eddy sends Vampiro into various metal implements on the floor.
- A series of reversals, ending with Vampiro hitting a type of reverse enzugiri.
- Vampiro comes off the top with a spinwheel kick.
- Eddy catches Vampiro up top, and superplexes him.
- Eddy goes up top, but the ICP comes down.
- Eddy looses his footing, but still manages to land on the ICP.
- The blown spot appears to injure Shaggy 2 Dope's leg.
- Vampiro with a spinning kick to Eddy's knees.
- Vampiro goes for a hotshot, and ends up hotshotting Eddy into Shaggy's head.
- Vampiro covers for the pin.
- Rey and Kidman run out to chase the Dead Pool off.
- Well, Shaggy didn't appear to be hurt, anyway.
Nitro Girls.
Match 10: Sting vs. WCW World Heavyweight Champion Hulk Hogan
- Michael Buffer comes out to do the honors.
- Sting gets the first entrance.
- A rematch of Starrcade '97.
- Hulk comes out with his left knee heavily bandaged.
- Sting and Hogan shake hands at the bell.
- Hogan pulls off the do-rag.
- They jockey for position against the ropes.
- They get in each others' faces and shove.
- They trade hammerlocks. Hogan breaks cleanly against the ropes.
- It'd be really nice if WCW used their brains and ran an angle where Hogan had to earn the trust of the fans back after 3-plus years of nWo. But that'd make too much sense.
- They have a stalemate over two shoulderblocks.
- Hogan rolls Sting up quickly for two.
- Test of strength.
- Sting with a small package for two.
- Hogan with a knee to the gut against the ropes.
- Hogan lands an avalanche clothesline for two.
- Hogan hits a running lariat.
- You can see the stage being set up for Kiss in the background, at the entryway.
- Sting clotheslines Hogan.
- Sting mounts the corner to deliver ten punches.
- Sting with a Hoganesque back rake.
- Sting bodyslams Hogan, who Hulks up and avoids an elbowdrop.
- Hogan with a boot to the gut in the corner.
- Hogan dumps Sting to the floor, including Sting elbowing Hogan on the announcers' table.
- They brawl on the floor.
- Hogan slams Sting, and drops an elbow.
- Hogan ducks too early for a backdrop, and Sting kicks him in the gut.
- Sting fights back.
- Sting hits a Vader splash in the corner for two.
- Sting slows down the already glacial pace with a chinlock.
- Hulk, well, Hulks up.
- Hogan with a faceslam.
- Heenan: "This is a great match, Tony."
- Hogan hits the big boot.
- Hogan plays to the crowd, and Sting avoids the Leg Drop of Doom.
- Sting with a Stinger Splash, but Hogan gets the boot up on the second one.
- Sting tries again, but Hogan just moves.
- Sid and Steiner run in for the lame ending.
- The fans boo. They're not booing the heels, they're booing the booking.
- Goldberg runs out for the save.
- Luger runs in as well.
- Hogan offers Sting another shot at the belt, with Goldberg and Luger watching their backs.
And to CLOSE the show, we're going to get Kiss and Brian Adams.
Kiss starts playing.
- What if they had a concert, and nobody cared?
- Let's see, Mick Foley or a 70s revival. Hmmm....
- At the end of the song, Brian Adams comes out dressed in Kiss gear.
- With that, we fade to black.
- I was wondering that, if Gene Simmons did the trick where he spit the blood out of his mouth, would WCW pull back to the wide-angle shot?
- That sucked just as bad as I imagined it would.

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