WCW/nWo Slamboree - Sunday, 5/9/99
WCW/nWo Slamboree - Sunday, 5/9/99
- Howdy once again, everyone. I am Big Mike, and it's time for Slamboree.
- What in the hell is happening here? WCW is more solid top to bottom than it was in the nWo days, but it is getting punked in the ratings big-time by the WWF. One thing I think WCW is doing a bad job of still is developing their characters. Every time you look, someone is turning from a face to a heel or a heel to a face. I mean seems like every time someone wins a title, they automatically turn heel. Bad policy, WCW. The marks get sick of not having anyone to root for, or even worse, not being sure who to root for. That is one area where the WWF is head and shoulders above WCW. How many times in the past year have you had a character in the WWF turn heel or turn face without it making sense in the storyline that had been developing the past few months? Sable was maybe one. I mean where in the hell did that heel turn come from? But that's it. In WCW, you've had DDP and Flair and a few others that just made not too much sense. And don't get me wrong, folks, I am still and have always been a WCW fan. It's just very hard to watch sometimes.
- Rowdy Roddy Piper. One of my all-time favorites. But, what is this? This is the worst storyline I have ever seen. I can't watch it. Flair in an insane asylum? What is that? It was kind of funny that he saw Scott Hall in there though. That was a good bit. Piper, however, is doing nothing for WCW at the moment, except making Vince McMahon happy he is in WCW. I think it's time for Bischoff to step down as head of WCW. Sure, he got WCW back on top for a while, but it is becoming sadly apparent that he has no ability to manage WCW to long-term success. Please, for the good of WCW, step down now Mr. Bischoff.
- OK, enough pre-show comments. Now, with a cold Modelo in hand, on to the show............
- We start with a montage of the participants in the matches tonight.
- We are live from the TWA Dome in St. Louis, Missouri, the site of one of the greatest football victories in Texas A&M history (against Kansas State in the Big XII Championship).
- Tony Schiavone, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan, and "Iron" Mike Tenay commentating.
- Schiavone calls Piper the "longtime commissioner of WCW." Huh?
- We got straight to Gene "Maitre'D" Okerlund in his white dinner jacket. Ugh, a hotline commercial already.
- Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko (w/ Arn Anderson), Raven/Saturn, and Rey Misterio Jr./Billy Kidman in a three-way dance for the WCW World Tag Team Titles.
- Wow, looks like a pretty good opening contest.
- Arn Anderson comes out with Benoit and Malenko.
- Raven and Saturn come out to Raven's Nirvana-esque music. It's not the same music he was coming out to though. It's not "Come As You Are." I really like this team.
- Kidman and Misterio come out and away we go.
- It will be Saturn, Kidman, and Malenko in the ring to begin.
- Saturn and Kidman go after Malenko right off the bat. Benoit comes in and gets punked.
- Malenko knocks Kidman off the top rope and tries to dive onto him, but Kidman introduces him to Mr. Safety Rail.
- Kidman up and over the top ropes. "Horsemen suck" chants begin. Whatever.
- Nice! Benoit is holding Kidman for a German suplex and Malenko drop kicks Kidman over and back.
- "Cousin" Rey Misterio Jr. (in overalls) comes in. Raven in as well and goes for the pin on Benoit and is pulled of by Cousin Rey.
- Kidman is in and powerbombs Benoit. He misses a top rope move and Benoit goes into the Crippler Crossface, but is pulled off by Raven. Raven holds Benoit for a frog splash by Saturn! Great move.
- Misterio comes in with a springboard moonsault on Malenko but is pulled off.
- Everyone fighting outside the ring but Benoit and Raven. Benoit executes a nice flying headbutt off the top rope, but Saturn comes in for the save.
- The Horsemen are now in control, as Benoit is beating on Saturn while Malenko holds everyone else off.
- Where in the hell are Kidman and Cousin Rey? Oh there they are finally coming back into the ring.
- The legal men now are Kidman, Saturn, and Benoit. All three men knock each other outside the ring. Benoit throws Saturn back in. Belly to back suplex by Benoit, but only a two count.
- Nice match for me to get broken in on tonight. There are about five hundred things going on at once.
- Benoit with three German suplexes in a row on Saturn, but Kidman comes in for the save before Benoit can get a three count.
- Rey Jr. tries to come in and gets admonished by Johnny Boone. Ha! I think the referee Johnny Boone accidentally poked Rey in the eye when he was pointing at him.
- Now it's Malenko, Saturn and Kidman. Malenko hits a drop kick and tags Benoit back in.
- Here comes Raven in like a house a-fire going after the other two men. Raven hits three vertical suplexes on Benoit. Kidman was out but comes back in. I think he went to look to see if Michael Bishop's teardrops were still on the carpet at the TWA Dome from after the Big XII Championship.
- Saturn comes in to scoop slam Benoit. Benoit gets up and is popped from off the top rope by Kidman. Misterio hits Saturn off the top. Misterio gets a broncobuster on Raven!
- Holy S-T! Kidman throws Rey up onto Benoit who is on the top rope and Rey nails a hurricanrana! They try the same thing on Saturn, but Saturn blocks in with a powerbomb.
- Saturn gives the DVD sign, he misses, and Arn Anderson comes in and hits a spinebuster on Saturn!!! Yes!!!!!! Kidman is on the top rope. Now a man comes in with a Sting mask and knocks Kidman off the top rope! Where did this guy come from? Malenko has the cloverleaf on Benoit, as Raven hits the Evenflow DDT on Kidman. Meanwhile, AA distracts the ref. The referee comes in, looks at Malenko, who doesn't have a submission yet, and at Raven covering Kidman and counts the 1-2-3! Raven and Saturn win!!!! The man in the Sting mask comes on the apron with the belts. It's Kanyon!!! Raven and Perry Saturn are your new WCW World Tag Team Champions!
- WHEW! Great first match!
- We see a montage of Diamond Dallas Page.
- Stevie Ray (w/ Horace and Vincent) vs. Konnan
- Yawn.
- Arriba la crappy matches.
- Konnan comes on and does his spiel on the mic. How exciting.
- Stevie Ray catches Konnan in the corner and mocks his spiel on the mic while he has him down. Ha!
- Hey the Texas Rangers are on ESPN! Oh wait, I'm supposed to be covering this match.
- You know, if Pudge Rodriguez shaved his head, he would look kind of like Konnan. Oh yeah, back to the match.
- Konnan is thrown outside where he is beat on by Horace and Vincent.
- Stevie Ray is in control of this match.
- Stevie Ray on top and comes down on Konnan's boot in one of the worst blown spots in the history of wrestling. That look WAAAAAAYYY too contrived, as 1) Konnan's boot is up there for about two minutes, and 2) He totally missed Stevie Ray!
- Vincent comes up on the apron and is put down by Vincent. Horace trips up Konnan. Here comes Cousin Rey Misterio Jr. Misterio puts down Vincent and Horace. Misterio is up top, and jumps on Stevie Ray. Konnan rolls Stevie Ray up for the 1-2-3, and Rey slips out of the ring.
- Yuck. How bad was that match? It was like eating Brussels Sprouts while drinking Castor Oil and watching a bad 50s science fiction movie, while the Bay City Rollers played in the background.
- We have a montage of Kevin Nash followed by Rick Steiner at the backstage internet location.
- Now a montage of Sting, followed by a backstage shot of DDP discussing something in secret with Bam Bam Bigelow. Tenay points out that they are both from the Jersey Shore. Nice attempt at a setup.
- Brian Knobbs vs. Bam Bam Bigelow for the title "King of Hardcore."
- Knobbs comes out to no music. Tenay states that it is a falls-count-anywhere match.
- Bigelow also comes out to no music with a hamper full of crap. Well, not crap, but it looks like he has the whole janitor's closet in there!
- They need a title belt. Bigelow comes in and is immediately pummeled by Knobbs with a trash can, then a waiter's tray, and then a cookie sheet. Mean Gene's gonna be pissed when he found out Knobbs stole his waiter's tray.
- This would be a good match for Knobbs old partner Jerry Saggs and Scott Hall.
- Ha! Tony makes a point of using the Dustyism "plunder" to refer to all the trash in the ring. Good one, Tony. No, seriously this time.
- Bigelow hits Knobbs with a trashcan. Tony is giving Tenay hell about how he always shouts out "Oh!" when someone gets hit with the plunder. That's actually pretty funny. Knobbs hits Bigelow with a chair. Knobbs takes a nasty spill over the top rope as the chair he was holding flies over. Damn. He almost fell right onto the point of the chair leg. That could have hurt.
- What do I say about this match. These guys are just beating the hell out of each other.
- Ooh! Bam Bam wants to play the cymbals with trashcan lids. I guess he wants to make sure Knobbs hears them, because Knobbs' head is right in between the lids.
- Schiavone: "Looks like a family reunion at the Heenan house."
- Knobbs uses what Tony says is JJ Dillon's empty candy bowl on Bigelow.
- Ouch. Bigelow throws Knobbs into the hamper and against the side of the ring.
- Knobbs just throws the trash at Bigelow. These guys look like they are really getting after it! No juice though (yet).
- Now Knobbs is dragging Bigelow to the back. Whoops. Bigelow with throws Knobbs into the railing and is now taking Knobbs to the back. He throws Knobbs into the wcw.com internet location! Alright! Maybe now we won't have to watch any of those dumb promos for the web site.
- They are at the souvenir stand now. Knobbs hits another trash can shot. Knobbs goes behind the curtain into the cavernous closed off part of the TWA Dome and finds a ladder with which to hit Bigelow.
- Now Bigelow blocks another ladder shot. Looks like it caught his ankle.
- Knobbs goes off the top of the railing over the souvenir stand and onto Bigelow!!
- Now Bigelow catches Knobbs and suplexes him through the souvenir stand table. Here's the count. 1-2-3. Bigelow wins.
- Great match again! I loved that!
- Rick Steiner vs. Booker T for the World Television Championship.
- I thought that back in the days when you started seeing TV champs, it was because they wanted a title to be defended on free television, so us poor people who couldn't get those PPVs back in the day could see a championship match.
- Nick Patrick is the referee. Anyone ever hear of the singer Kinky Friedman? He's always on Don Imus' radio show. I just realized how much Nick Patrick looks like "the Jewish Cowboy." Oh well.
- Slow match so far.
- Body slam by Booker T.
- Looks like we are falling into a pattern of a great match followed by a terrible match.
- Both men are outside now, and Rick Steiner is smacking Booker T around the safety rails.
- Back in the ring, Steiner executes a release German suplex on Booker T. Steiner is completely in control
- Booker T slowly takes control back.
- Booker T goes for the axe kick and then the sidewalk slam. He goes up for the missile dropkick. On target. Here comes Scott Steiner to hit Booker T! Rick hits the Steiner line. Two count. Booker T throws Rick into his brother. Two count only. Scott Steiner trips up Booker T. Steiner bulldog off the top rope. 1-2-3! We have a new World Television Champion, and it's Rick Steiner!
- Montage of the Robinson/Flair/Savage/Gorgeous George situation
- Rick Steiner is backstage warning Buff about his brother.
- "Little Natch" Charles Robinson w/ Ric Flair and Asia vs. Gorgeous George w/ Madusa, Miss Madness and Randy Savage.
- Ha ha ha!!! Charles Robinson comes out with bleached hair in a Nature Boy robe to Flair's music with Asia (hmmm) and Flair. He looks like Flair at about 12 years old. He's even got Flair's haircut.
- If Gorgeous George wins, Savage gets reinstated to WCW.
- Gorgeous George comes out in a sparkly outfit. It almost looks like a cheerleader outfit. With a big GG on her chest. Oh my. Too bad Jerry Lawler isn't commentating. He would say something like, "LOOK AT THIS JR!!! SHE'S IN A CHEERLEADER OUTFIT!!! OH MY GOD JR!!!"
- Miss Madness looks pretty nice in her own right and Madusa looks tougher than nails. She's solid.
- Flair gets on the mic, and says Madusa and Miss Madness can come up to his room later, but he is leaving Gorgeous George to Little Natch. Robinson gets on the mic and does his best to sound like Flair. Now it's Savage's turn. He simply says, "Nature Boy and Little Nature Boy, say what you want, but Gorgeous George is going to kick your ass! OOOOOOH YEEEEEEEAH!" Nice reply.
- Brain says that if he was in this match, he would be disqualified for holding. Nice one Brain!
- Robinson does some strutting as Savage gives GG some advice.
- They are now trading arm drags w/ twists. Basic, but OK. GG puts Little Natch in a wristlock into a hammerlock. Not bad. GG now puts on a full nelson and an arm drag takeover. She jumps up. That is a skirt she's wearing by the way. GG throws Robinson into Flair as he comes up onto the apron. Flair and Macho Man face down in the center of the ring. Macho does his best Fred Sanford impersonation as he winds up his fists and I could have swore I just heard Flair call him a "fish-eyed fool."
- Meanwhile, outside the ring, Miss Madness 1999, takes a chair away from Charles Robinson and Robinson scoop slams her on the mat!! Nasty bump. What the hell was that?
- Charles Robinson comes in the ring and is shoved down by referee Johnny Boone!
- As Macho and Madusa attend to Miss Madness, GG comes back in and Charles Robinson tries to choke her out on the rope.
- Boone admonishes Robinson again for using the chokehold. Robinson gives GG a Flair chop and GG returns the favor three times! Robinson goes up top and is sent down with a powerslam by Gorgeous George. Now a clothesline. HAHAHA! Robinson does the Flair Flop. That is awesome!
- This is actually pretty entertaining.
- GG hits the turnbuckle and Asia is working on her knee. Here comes Madusa to break it up!! The referee is outside and Robinson has GG in some sort of a stepover toehold working on the knee.
- Robinson now getting vicious and twisting the knee. Robinson puts the figure-four leglock on. By the way, Miss Madness is back up.
- Now Gorgeous George reverses it. Asia distracts Johnny Boone, and Flair comes in to break the hold. Here comes Macho, knocking Flair out of the ring and giving Robinson a crotch shot and a body slam. Now GG is on the middle rope. Big elbow by Gorgeous George on Robinson a la Randy Savage. 1-2-3. Macho Man is reinstated!
- Macho clears the ring and then lifts Gorgeous George on his shoulders!
- Not too terrible of a match all things considered. Gorgeous George has some talent (she also has some wrestling talent by the way), and Robinson did not do that bad of a job in the match either.
- Montage of the Buff Bagwell-Scott Steiner situation
- Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner for the United States Heavyweight Championship.
- Quick start as Buff goes after Steiner right off the bat.
- Steiner retaliates with a low blow.
- They are both outside now fighting. Back in and Steiner is working on the neck and back of Buff. Steiner clearly and loudly yells "Come on you piece of s-t!" to a fan (or maybe to Buff). Lucky we're on pay per view.
- Steiner yelling at the fans and working on Buff. Release powerbomb by Steiner.
- Buff knocks a chair right into Steiner as Steiner tries to use it. Two dropkicks and an atomic drop by Buff.
- Buff now clothesline Scott Steiner and the referee and Scott pulls the referee in front.
- Here comes Rick Steiner! He tells Buff not to hit Scott with the chair, but to go up to the top rope. Buff goes up to and Rick Steiner gives Buff a chair shot!!!! The Steiners are back together.
- Steiner Recliner by Scott Steiner and it's over. Scott Steiner retains the championship.
- The reunited Steiner brothers work on Buff some more as we go to a montage of Sting/Goldberg.
- Montage of Flair and Piper. I wouldn't mind seeing a Flair face turn and Piper just getting the crap kicked out of him.
- "Rowdy" Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair w/Arn Anderson and Asia for control of World Championship Wrestling.
- Piper comes out to his bagpipe theme music. No matter, what you think of Piper, I still love his entrance. Back in the WWF days, I remember a certain time when he had a messed up leg, and wasn't supposed to come out. Here comes the bagpipe music though and out comes Piper and of course wins the match, all the while selling the leg injury. It was classic.
- Here comes Flair. He is announced as being from Asia as well as Charlotte, North Carolina. Huh?
- Calling his valet Asia is REALLLLY shaky by the way.
- Johnny Boone is the referee? Flair calls out Charles Robinson in his referee suit now and fires Johnny Boone. I just realized that Johnny Boone wears two earrings. I guess he is like the Generation X referee.
- Flair calls out Piper and Piper slaps the crap out of him.
- Piper and Flair look like twins in their identical blue trunks, blue kneepads and black boots.
- Piper spits on Flair.
- Piper thinks Flair is Bob Orton, as he is giving Flair lefts and rights from his boxer's stance.
- Flair starts walking down the aisle, but Piper grabs him and they trade blows.
- Flair begs for a time out and Piper gives him a two-finger eye poke. This is classic for these two. This match might as well have been wrestled about fifteen years ago. Yup, there's a crotch shot by Flair.
- Flair throws Piper out and Arn Anderson goes to work on Piper, as Charles Robinson is, umm, "distracted." AA throws Piper back in the ring.
- Flair talks smack to some of St. Louis finest citizens in the front row.
- Robinson is "distracted" again by AA, and Asia comes in to give Piper a knee to his bagpipes.
- Piper comes back with slaps and chops until Flair goes to the eyes. Now Piper comes back with a back body drop. Robinson will not count to three. He says Flair's shoulder is up. Robinson is talking to Flair again as Anderson works on Piper.
- Piper sends Flair out of the ring after recovering and goes after him and slams Flair into the safety rail.
- Both men collide in the ring and go down. Robinson starts the mandatory ten count as he tries to revive Flair. He does and Flair goes to work on the knee of Piper with the help of Arn Anderson.
- Flair locks the figure four on Piper. Piper finally reverses the move, and Flair breaks it and throws Piper out to AA. Piper pops AA and goes back into the ring for the sunset flip. Oh no. Yup. Piper gives grabs Flair's tights and the whole crowd gets a Flair full moon.
- Backslide by Piper, and Robinson is "distracted" again. Inside cradle by Piper and Robinson goes to talk to Double A again.
- Piper takes Flair off the top rope and Piper puts Flair in the figure four! Flair is giving up, but Robinson won't end it. Anderson comes in and gets a sleeper from Piper for his trouble. Now Piper puts Flair in the sleeper! Here comes Asia. Piper no-sells her shot and kisses Asia on the mouth! Now Asia is in the sleeper. Robinson tries to pull him off and gets a shot to the head for his trouble. Flair comes back with an "international object" and pops Piper. Flair gets the 1-2-3. It's over.
- Wait, here comes Eric "Whitey" Bischoff out! He tells Flair to shut the hell up. This is getting good. Bischoff says he screwed a lot of stuff up, but he won't screw this up. Bischoff says Piper wins and tells Flair to bite him! Piper and Bischoff embrace. Flair keeps saying, "I'm the boss!" Piper tells Flair he is fired! Flair tells Piper he will "kick him out of the g.d. building." Flair is going nuts yelling a little kid in the front row! That's weird. Bischoff says to shut Flair's microphone off, and it is shut off. Piper thanks Bischoff and Piper and Bischoff embrace again!
- Nice little curveball at the end there. That was kind of weird and certainly unexpected.
- Sting vs. Goldberg.
- Schiavone is trying to rationalize how Bischoff can still make a decision like that after he got "fired" as president of WCW. At least they are trying to maintain some continuity. He states that Bischoff is still "heavily involved in the decision making process."
- OK. This might be a good match.
- Scoop slam by Goldberg early in the match. Now Goldberg clotheslines Sting over the top rope.
- Sting comes back in and drop kicks Goldberg and sends him over the top rope.
- Goldberg comes back in and slams Sting over into an armlock.
- Sting comes off the rope and bulldogs Goldberg into the mat. Goldberg has a brace on his knee and Sting dropkicks the knee. Sting is now working on the knee and puts Goldberg into a Boston Crab. Goldberg powers out.
- Goldberg is really selling the knee injury now.
- After a few rest holds, Sting suplexes Goldberg. Goldberg pops back up and suplexes Sting followed by a swinging neckbreaker. Pin attempt by Goldberg, but a two count only.
- Goldberg misses a spear and Sting hits a clothesline off the top rope, followed by two Stinger Splashes. He tries a third, but Goldberg catches him into a spear. Both men are down. Here comes Bret Hart!!!! He throws the referee out and brains Goldberg with a chair. Hart is now giving Goldberg chair shots to the knee! The match is thrown out and Bret Hart leaves.
- Here come the Steiner brothers. They immediately attack both wrestlers. Rick is working on Goldberg's knee as Scott goes after Sting. Whatever you think, you gotta like the Steiner brothers being back together.
- Full of surprises tonight, aren't we. Solid PPV so far, with one match to go. Now, if they could only get Nitro and the buildup to these PPVs to be as good, they'd be a lot better off in WCW.
- Montage of Page and Nash.
- "Big Sexy" Kevin Nash vs. Diamond Dallas Page for the World Heavyweight Championship
- We are back, and waiting for Michael Buffer to come out as Goldberg and Sting try to clear out of the ring.
- Nick "Kinky Friedman" Patrick is the referee.
- Bookerman Nash comes out first.
- Here comes DDP. You know, I have mixed feelings about DDP as a heel. I know WCW and Page may have felt they wanted to go in a different direction. But, he was such a good face, sort of in the Steve Austin mold, being the "people's man," and all.
- Page goes for an early diamond cutter, but Nash blocks it and sends Page out of the ring.
- Both men are outside now, and Nash slams DDP across the safety rail.
- Nash is in control as we come back in the ring.
- Nash is carrying Page in preparation for a power slam, but Page slides out and goes after Nash in the corner. Nash shrugs Page off twice. The third time, DDP comes over and gives Nash a kick to his wolfpack.
- Page has some wire cutters now and is exposing the turnbuckle in the corner. Page shows Nick Patrick it is exposed and Patrick goes to look at it. Page nails Nash with the microphone, but only gets a two count!
- Nash trips DDP into the exposed steel turnbuckle. Both men are down.
- Nash goes for the cover, but only gets a two count.
- Both men are trading blows, and Page clotheslines Nash over the top rope.
- Page with a baseball slide dropkick onto Nash outside. Diamond Cutter by Page on the floor now!
- Nash is laying on the ground, and Page tries to cover Nash on the floor. Page tells Nick Patrick falls count anywhere, but Nick Patrick tells Page he has to get back in the ring.
- Page rolls Nash back in and tries to cover Nash using the ropes as leverage. Nash kicks out, and Page yells at Nick Patrick for not counting fast enough.
- Nash is down in the ring, and Page hits a knee and then an elbow to Nash's "down there."
- Page pulls Nash over to the corner and works Nash's knee on the ringpost.
- Page looks like he is going for the figure four around the ringpost, but Nash pulls Page into the ringpost with his legs.
- Both men are back in the ring now. Page is taunting Nash and the crowd.
- Meanwhile, Nash gets back up and takes over on Page, with a clothesline and a drop into the exposed turnbuckle.
- Big boot to the face by Nash. Hey, isn't that the Barbarian's finishing move?
- Jackknife powerbomb by Nash. Wait, here comes Randy Savage! Savage goes after Nash and Nick Patrick throws the match out. Savage brains Nash with the championship belt.
- Wait, here comes Eric Bischoff with Doug Dillenger. What?
- He instructs Doug Dillenger to escort Savage to the back. Bischoff tells Nick Patrick to continue the match. He says if "Ted Turner or Harvey Schiller or anyone else doesn't like it, tell them to call me tomorrow morning!" Bischoff says there has to be a winner.
- As we start what is now apparently a no-DQ match, according to Schiavone, Page hits a clothesline and then a sleeper.
- Nash fights his way out and puts Page into a sleeper. Page retaliates with a jawbreaker, but only gets a two count.
- Page gets a chair from outside, but Nash moves out the way. The chair slingshots off the top rope and catches Page in the head. Nash covers, but only a two count. Nash picks up the chair, but Page retaliates with a crotch shot a la Ric Flair.
- Page picks up the chair now, but Nash kicks the chair into Page's head!
- Nash sets Page up for the jackknife powerbomb again. Cover by Nash! 1-2-3! We have a new World Heavyweight Champion, and it is Kevin Nash!
- Very nicely done match. I liked that.
- Nash celebrates, as we fade to black with a Great American Bash promo.
- Great PPV! Several curves thrown. Even the Charles Robinson/Gorgeous George match was good, even though I expected it to suck. Robinson emulating the Nature Boy was priceless! Bischoff "redeemed" himself twice tonight, both in the storylines, and maybe in other ways too (see comments at the top of the page). Some of the undercard matches, most notably the tag team three-way dance and the Knobbs/Bigelow hardcore match were excellent. Bring Nitro back around and we're doing some good here!
- Well, adios everyone, I am Big Mike, and I am out.