I get the feeling I'm trapped in that old Star Trek episode about the evil parallel universe. Jerry Flynn getting a push. Tony "Sidewalk Slam" Schiavone threatening Mike Tenay and The Brain. Ed Leslie with yet another "heel" turn. Hogan driving off the Four Horsemen so easily, Benoit and Malenko with two punches each, Anderson with only a forearm and an eyerake (I get a mental image of a TV flying out a window while somebody yells "Bill! What in the HELL are you doing?") only moments after no-selling about ten or so of Flair's knife edge chops.
They always usta' say there aren't any monsters, well there are. They're called "Hulkamania" and "Nash with the book."
OK, last Thunder hit about 9 out of 10 on the WTF (What the f*ck) scale!! Does anyone really believe that the aging Orange Ego could knock down The Four Horsemen on his own?
WCW is really doing some useless stuff in booking matches. Flair is a great heel but Hogan back as The Hulkster??!! Here's a guy who has been fleeing from matches for years now. He's never Hulked up in the past but all of a sudden, out of the big f*ckin' blue, this guy finds some long lost energy. Why? BECAUSE HE'S A FACE! Flair has been kicking out of finishers recently but he can't kick out of Hogan's Granny Legdrop of Eternal Doom?! Why? BECAUSE HE'S A HEEL!
Not only does this hurt the credibility of the sport but it throws wrestling back years. Not necessarily a bad thing, if they would take the good parts like logical angle building and feuding! But the Face's hulk-up and the Heel's cheating win...cliches of the past!
The good: Ed Leslie's contract is almost up.
The bad: This is a work to put Hogan over.
The ugly: The Orange Ego is going to run wild on The Horsemen. Guess Nash and co. really don't care about Tradition.
I know that you were joshing, but that one will go down in the anals (not annals) of markdom.
One quick comment about the main event last night. I ws acutally cheering for Hogan. Before you delete this, let me finish. If Ed won his contract got renewed for 3 years at double the money. Scary. this means he would have to get a push. Scarier. He would probaly have to develop/copy some new moves such as the Zodiac Cutter, the Butcher Crossface, The Barber Driver, and finally the always dreaded Man with no Name Deathlock. Scariest.
As always great report, I laughed.
Aldo, I had to scroll back to the top of the page to double-check the author's name. You didn't sound like your normal self. Regardless, I found the temporary new you to be quite funny... you did the "faked sincerity" bit quite well! "Smiley with the full arm drag and twist. Only Schiavone can call that correctly because everyone else SUCKS" ... this had me laughing out loud.
Good stuff Aldo, thanks for the entertainment.
Thanks. I speak for the truth, you know. Forget Ix Nay Tenay. When you hear Tony Schiavone call a spinning flying body attack or a back-leg front kick, you know you are dealing with a quality announcer.
That facepaint Damien had on his match with Wrath made him look like the guy in "Magic's Secrets Revealed" on Fox... unfortunately all Damien revealed was his steady diet of squash.