I think you may have missed the most important point in the entire broadcast. It was subtle, and had absolutely nothing to do with wrestling, but... Tenay was snide. That was a legitimate quip on "Iron" Mike Tenay's part when he said, "Great scoop, Tony," to Schiavonne's stunning realization that the second doctor wasn't Jamaican, but, in reality, Old Man Bagwell. (Who probably would have gotten away with it, if it weren't for T-Bone's dazzling intellect.)
For the first time, in his passive aggressive way, Tenay is fighting back. For the past several months he has been quietly correcting Tony when he says things like "back leg front kick" or "version of the sidewalk slam" when referring to a spinebuster. Now is Tenay's time. Soon, he'll be the one telling Heenan to be quiet, Skeeavone will be the Taco Bell Chihuahua to Tenay's Red Dog.
This is the revolution the Warrior was talking about. Tenay and Gorditas.
Tenay - you can't stop him, you can only hope to contain him. And God forbid you get on his bad side - he'll run right through you like a bad burrito!
I'm in the Army (and my buddy is a Ranger). Saturn isn't bullshitting - you basically go without food and sleep for 62 straight days in Ranger school.
I'll file that under "Lists of reasons to never piss either Saturn or an Army Ranger off." Wow!
My main observation: do you ever play any of the Street Fighter games? If so, Warrior totally pulled Akuma's deathmove last night: the screen goes white, we hear pummeling, and when we return, the competition is out cold. Huh. I wonder if Bischoff is a Street Fighter fan... I think Sting worked better as the invincible avenger, though.
Well, we've already seen Sub-Zero wrestling, why not Akuma?
There was some very decent wrestling on the program, from Marty Janetty, Disco Inferno, and Evan Kourageous. Did you notice that they spelled it "Evan Karagias" yesterday?
Yes, I'm partial, but you have to admit Lodi is one of the funniest things in wrestling today. And I've watched him at Indy Wrestling events, he's a damn good wrestler.
How in the world could Hogan not choose the Giant for War Games? He single-handedly took out the majority of team WCW! But no, he takes Stevie Ray.
I am pretty sure "Dr. Cecil Schwartz" is a friend of Bischoff. That would make sense, as Bischoff is known for hiring friends.
Disco's pants blinded me.
How did Al Green get a match for the title? Don't you have to be good? Whatever happened to top contenders. Why not give me a shot at Goldberg, I have as good a chance as Al Green (actually, I could win. I just bend his fingers back and make him sub mit. It's cheap, but it works).
How does Luger make his muscles dance like that? If I could do that, I'd never wear a shirt.
Evan is trying to have more spellings of his name than Ed Leslie has personalities. This week, I predict he'll come out with his name spelled in Sanskrit. The next week, smoke signals.
During the Juvi match the fans were reacting to a couple of girls in the section behind me. Their section tried futilely to start a 'Take it Off' chant, so me and my section started a pretty loud 'Show Your Tits' chant, but of course they didn't. They j ust stood up and showed off. We kept the chant going and a group of kids came and stood in front of their section with a sign that said the same as our chant. The girls stood up after a 'One More Time' chant and then another 'Show Your Tits' chant. But never any tits. It was great, till the rent-a-pigs broke it up.
What's the world coming to these days when you can't even see boobs when you go out to a wrestling match? Oh well, I suppose that somehow, some way, life will go on.....
Something's been bothering me over the last few weeks, and maybe you, as my favorite play by play guy, can help me find the truth:
Where, exactly, DOES the power lie?
Is it still in Hogan's palm? Or is Bischoff's pen where the power lies? Perhaps the power lies in Alex Wright's pants?
You would think, by the name, that the power would lie somewhere in the tag team (can I say tag team anymore?) of High Voltage, but that seems ludicrous.
Does the power lie somewhere inside of former great wrestler (gag!) and now great jobber Jim Powers?
Please help me. I don't sleep at night anymore!
I really don't have anything to add to this, other than the fact that this is possibly the funniest wrestling-related email I've ever gotten!
One more thing you might should've spelled out in your "semi-review" of FPS6MS: Being a Japanese game, you'll also need a converter to play it (on US or Euro systems) . I realize many would figure this out, but some would get home and wonder why they keep getting an error message.
- Miki T. calls me on:
"Speaking of the WWF (yeah, I know, this is a Nitro report. This'll be the last WWF thing tonight), I've got to admit: I was impressed by something they did this past week. No, not the wrestling vampire, the wrestling porn star, the wrestling freak shows, the wrestling burned-brother-of-the-dead-guy-with-magical-powers, etc."
The above appeared in the 8/31 edition of Nitro. I'd like to hear your opinion of the face-painted-jeans-wearing-apparently-able-to-teleport-and-knock-out-members-of-the-NWO-(except for Hogan, who is apparently above such things)-without-touching-them-guy, currently being booed when he spends 10 minutes talking about...what the hell IS he talking about?
Ok, you got me. I admit it - Warrior's a joke. A big joke. An absurd joke. And a damn nutcase to boot!
Quick compare and contrast on the former partners Sting and Warrior.
Sting (circa-1997) Warrior (now) Leading one man war on nWo Leading one man war on nWo Appears when you least expect it Appears "when you least expect it" Dramatic entrances "dramatic entrances" Child's voice reciting on his original return entrance Uninitelligible garble on his entrances black and white facepaint multi-colored facepaint "Actions speak louder than words" "All talk, no action" Audience popped every time he showed up Audience pops when he arrives, dies soon after Appeared to attack nWo members If he hits anyone, it's by total accident
You get the idea. Just a disgruntled Sting mark sharing my view. Later.
- It was not a sellout, several sections on the Camera Side were not used. But is was a big crowd, the best of the three Pensacola Nitros.
- No Dark Matches, before or after the show.
- Wildcat Willy did his normal routine, the Nitro Girls were introduced, one did a backward flip from the top rope to the canvas - not bad at all. Did get a real nice pop from the crowd.
- Huge Goldberg chant started when his match was announced before the show. If you think the sound is mixed in, it was live here in Pensacola.
- The fire from the ring posts puts out a lot of heat.
That's my report. Not a great night, but not a bad night. Could have been better, but I have been at worse.
- This is my fifth Nitro, third in Pensacola. The crowd is hot to start.
- The big screen TV comes on and we see the backstage actions of Hogan....not sure what is really going on, but do get the idea someone was taken off in ambulance but don't know who.
- Hogan and crew to the ring. Get good response - negative heat, but not as good as in the past. Hogan has received a lot more heat in Pensacola, but it is not there this time.
- First match - Bull Pain and Konnan.
- Konnan is over big time with the crowd. Everyone is ready to go. The fans repeat all the Spanish sayings from Konnan - I don't they know what they mean, but they do repeat them. The match is short and quick but the fans are into it. Konnan with the Tequila Sunrise and it is over. Big ovation. The show has started up well, but it is about to slowly fiss for a bit.
- Mean Gene/JJ Dillion - Who cares, no one does, wasted time.
- Mean Gene/DDP - The security guards set up his approach route to the ring early. Several fans recognize this and make their way close to the path. My co-partner in crime for this event heads over. On cue, here comes DDP through the crowd. Serurity leading the way.
- DDP has lost some of heat. He is not playing well with the crowd. He is not over like he was the last time in Pensacola. There are still a lot of fans but he is no longer the "Darling" of the crowd. Goldberg has eaten away at DDP fan base, I believe, plus he is lost in the shuffle.
- Big pop when Nash, Sting and Luger come out. This is Wolfpac country now.
- Mean Gene/Roddy Piper - Piper is dead. No reaction at all. The Hot Rod has never recovered from the "Debacle" at the Georgia Dome when he had tryouts for "Team Piper". I used to look forward to the Hot Rod, but no more.
- Match 2: Lenny Lane - Wrath (Bryan Clark)
- How long has it been since we had a match, about 30 minutes, the spirit of the crowd is gone.
- Bryan Clark does look mean in there, he is one of those guys that just looks bad to the bone.
- The fans appreciate some of Wrath's power moves and chops but overall, dead match.
- There did seem to me a little flare up from Clark toward Lane at the end but nothing to speak of.
- Match 3: Sorta - Hart vs ? - We had been told that there would be a US Title defense tonight before the event started. We are never sure who the opponent is suppose to be. It ends up moving the plot line along for Stint/Hart partnership some where down the line.
- Wasted time - Hart is a good wrestler, let him wrestle....why bring him in to tease a match and barely move a plot line along. Sting helping him out after a match would have made more sense and entertained the crowd more.
- The crowd felt cheated out of a match and you know what, they were.
- Match 4: Scott Steiner - Evan Karagias, the video of Rick Steiner was good, Scott Steiner was poor.
- Without Buff Bagwell in the ring, Scott's interview skills are in trouble. I know Bagwell was in the booth and probably added something from there, but the crowd was dead from what Scotty was saying.
- Match was not real good and the finish seemed a little off. It looked like the ref DQ'd somebody by the way he acted. But I presume that Steiner got the win.
- Match 5: Hector Garza/Juvi Guerrera
- Hector is bigger than a cruiser, he has to be 245 to 250.
- Good match, the crowd was not into real hot but did appreciate the better moves.
- The first powerbomb by Garza on Juvi stunned Guerrera some. He did hit his head hard and seemed to have trouble with his arm for a while. Hector had to pull him up at one point on a pin. But it only lasted about a minute and then Juvi was back at it.
- Everyone wanted to see the 450 but we had to settle on the Driver (Didn't someone say somewhere that he couldn't use this move any more because another Vampiro would be using it as his finisher?)
- Match 6: The Cat/Kaos
- Can anyone tell me why?, the fans didn't care, the wrestlers didn't care, no one cared and then they let the Cat speak and challenge the locker room. Who did you think was coming out of the back - Glacier.
- Waste of time.
- Match 7: Chris Adams/Stevie Ray
- Another sleeper, and this is the Third Anniversary, boy, real big matches. My buddy is more impressed when I tell him that Adams trained Steve Austin and that Austin took Adams' wife away and caused a divorce between the two and Austin married the fomer Mrs. Adams.
- Match is a bore. Fans know it is a bore.
- Match 8: Riggs/Saturn
- Not sure on how this all came about, I think Riggs was supposed to face Kanyon but it ended up in a Saturn/Riggs match. The crowd did get back into it.
- The guy about four people down from me hates Raven and keeps throwing ice at him (We are the first row, behind ringside seats).
- Some good moves in match. Interesting twists at the end....came off pretty good live. The pop is back with the crowd. And Riggs spit on a woman in the front row, don't know why, but I saw it as Riggs was leaving the ring and it was real. Big one too. She was not real happy.
- Match 9: Jericho/Anvil Neidhart
- Where did they dig up the "Anvil" for this show?
- Jericho is pretty good and does have a following in the crowd.
- The Anvil is red-faced in the first three minutes of the match.
- The ending looked real weird to the live audience. Neidhart never submitted, the ref rings the bell, and Jericho is the winner?
- Someone will have to explain this to me....is Vince McMahon paying off these officials too...
- Eddie Guerrero - Not as good as some of the other "Shoots" from Eddie, but I did chuckle under my breathe.
- Match 10: Hennig/Malenko in a Steel Cage
- The most anticipated match of the evening.
- Biggest question, would blood be allowed?
- Good solid match, old style match, with Hennig pulling an "Anderson" on Malenko and working on one body part.
- The end comes, no real blood, but as they begin to pull Malenko toward the door, you know someone is going to becoming down the aisle, the only question, will it be Flair or Anderson and it is Anderson.
- The place does explode. The four fingers go up everywhere and I'm even yelling with four fingers up in the air - my only emotional outbreak of the evening.
- Anderson cleans house and opens the door for the Horsemen and the return of Flair (If it happens, I would rather see Ric in the WWF, where he will be used better).
- Match 10: Goldberg/Putski
- What can you say for about 3 - 4 minutes of pure energy from the fans?
- The usual, but the fans were pumped. And then it is over.
- And yes, the Goldberg chant was real.
- Match 11: DDP & Piper vs. Luger & Sting
- Wolfpac comes out to big ovation, Piper nothing, DDP - So-so.
- The match is not real good but could have been worse.
- Here comes Nash. The place goes wild.
- He powerbombs DDP and then the ref. The ref was a real surprise.
- Sting didn't look too happy, Luger seemed to like it. You can see the breakup coming, War Games will be interesting.
- And then we see the locker room again, Brutus.....Disciple....whoever, has went down. Here comes Hogan and the Giant....you can smell the Warrior a mile away.
- The cage is lowered, Hogan has checked under the ring, sorry, but I don't remember that happening. Here comes the smoke. The Giant falls on his own, no one is near...it happened right in front of me. The smoke clears and the Warrior is there - the guy has spent four hours under the ring....sorry but there are no tunnels under the Pensacola Civic Center.
- Hogan with a chair shot, we see the Warrior of old, Hogan runs, the Warrior leaves by the Smoke Route again.
- After the show, the cage is lifted, the Giant finally wakes up, sees whose coat is draped over him, leaves the ring quickly. Show is over.
- Overall impression:
- The first Nitro in Pensacola was better. This was not a good anniversary show. Needed a few better matches. Let Hart wrestle, let some of the other more talented guys get some time - but no, we get the Cat and Kaos, not very good.
- Several fights did break out in the arena with several arrests.
- The sign police was in full force, I saw at least 15 - 20 signs taken, before and during the show.
- Idiot beer vendors were allowing minors to drink, this lead to several of the outbreaks. Nothing major, but some pushing and shoving.
- Best signs of the night:
- DDP is trailer trash.
- Hogan fears Rogaine.
- I don't have any underwear on.
- Be fair to Flair.