WCW Thunder, Wednesday, 08/05/98
WCW Thunder, Wednesday, 08/05/98
By Bill
Separated At Birth?
I'm Mr. Sting Miser
I'm Mr. Splash
I'm Mr. Death-Dropper
I'm Mr. Kicking-Your-Ass...
- Trivia Question: Who did Terry Gordy defeat on May 30th, 1986 in Houston, TX in the final round of a tournament to become the first UWF World Heavyweight Champion?
- As for the pictures up top, I've obviously overestimated the average age of my audience. I got more "what are those pictures of?" than "hey, that's really funny". The characters are Cold Miser and Heat Miser from the Christmas special A Year Without A Santa Claus. I have a tape of it. One of my co-workers said it's no longer shown because Heat Miser seemed so satanic. I have no idea if that's true.
Thanks to Andy K. for the song lyrics.
- Regarding WCW not acknowledging that other wrestling companies exist (which one of the weekend guys was talking about), I, too, remember back in the mid-80s when the WWF was riding high, not only did they not acknowledge other wrestling companies, they wouldn't really cooperate with the non-WWF wrestling magazines. For example, when a WWF wrestler won a PWI achievement award, you'd never see the WWF wrestler posing with the award. Instead, there'd be some stock photo of the wrestler. The NWA wrestlers would always pose with the award. These days, all the major federations cooperate with Pro Wrestling Illustrated.
- In this month's Pro Wrestling Illustrated, they have an old photo of a wrestler Steven Wright, father of Alex Wright. Someone asked me about Alex's father some time ago and I said I didn't think he was a wrestler. Obviously, I was wrong. Even the pro wrestling relations FAQ doesn't have that one.
- On additional note on Ric Drasin. Not only was he the "middle Hulk", which is pretty cool, but he was the original designer and the model for the bald-headed weightlifter on the Gold's Gym logo. Ric originally drew it on the back of a cocktail napkin.
- For those of you who keep sending me the link to "The King's Court" saying that it's Jerry Lawler's official web page and I should link to it, you are incorrect. It is not endorsed by him in any way that I've been able to ascertain.
- I've seen a number of "Pro Wrestling Drinking Games" around the Web. The other day, I was stuck on a long Metro ride with nothing to do, so I jotted down an updated 1998 version of the WCW Monday Nitro Drinking Game. If I do say so myself, this isn't too bad for twenty-five minutes worth of work:
- Larry Zbyszko says "tradition", drink. Larry makes a comment about A.C. Jazz, chug.
- A new Nitro Girl debuts, drink.
- Every time one of the Nitro Girls messes up the routine, drink.
- If Chris Jericho says "Jo Jo", "paragon of virtue" or "role model", drink. If he mispronounces the name of the town he's in, drink twice. If he says something will "never, ever happen again", chug.
- If Curt Hennig comes out drunk, drink. If Scott Hall comes out sober, chug.
- Someone in the crowd holds up a sign with a misspelling, drink. Someone in the crowd gets a sign taken away, drink. Someone in the crowd holds up a sign upside down, drink twice.
- Someone gets powerbombed, drink. If the announcers don't call it a powerbomb, drink again.
- One of the announcers states a blatant historical inaccuracy, drink. If it's anyone other than Okerlund, drink again.
- Someone gets their tights pulled down in the back, drink. Chug if it's anyone other than Flair.
- Crowd "Whoos" when someone does a backhand chop, drink. Crowd does "We want Flair" chant, chug.
- Okerlund hypes the 1-900 hotline, drink.
- Someone gets their head banged into the turnbuckle or gets punched ten times in a row with the crowd counting along, drink. Chug if the head is first banged into the top turnbuckle, then middle, then bottom, or they are punched nine times and then something different is done for the tenth punch.
- Neidhart says "Yeah, baby!", drink...one drink the first time, two the second time, etc.
- Someone's finisher is no-sold, drink. Chug if anyone other than Goldberg does it.
- Ciclope hurts himself during a match, drink.
- Tony Schiavone misuses the word "literally", drink.
- "Diamond" Dallas Page pretends to break kayfabe, drink. Chug if he actually uses the word "shoot".
- Lodi gets beaten up, drink.
- A tag team or faction teases a break up, drink once for each tease. Chug if it's Hennig and Rude or if the group/team actually does break up.
- Any wrestler points the microphone at the audience, drink. Chug if it's Scott Hall.
- Any wrestler mentions the name of the city they are in to get a cheap pop, drink. Drink twice if it's Konnan. Chug if it's Kevin Nash or DDP.
- If Silver King is wrestling and Mike Tenay says not to be fooled by his stocky physique, drink. When Silver King blows up during his ring entrance, chug.
- A new t-shirt is debuted, drink.
- Kanyon debuts a new move, drink.
- Raven or Saturn get a new body piercing or tattoo, drink.
- Someone gets saliva on the camera lens, drink.
- The tag team titles are defended, drink. Chug if they are defended by the two guys that actually won them.
- Someone is successfully impersonated (DDP as La Parka, Lenny Lane as Chris Jericho, Malenko as Ciclope, fake Mortis), drink. Someone is unsuccessfully impersonated (fake Sting, fake Rey Misterio, Bore-Us Malenko), drink twice. An impersonator writes a bad check for $32,000, call a cop.
DDT Digest's own Wade will be collecting suggestions for additional reasons to drink and I'll post this as a feature. If you have any suggestions, send them to Wade. Please, don't be offended if yours isn't selected, we can't post all of them.
- We are live from Casper, Wyoming. Anybody reading this in Wyoming? If so, send me a damn e-mail so I'll have gotten mail from all 50 states!
- Surprise! The announcers start the show hyping the main event of Road Wild.
- The rumors are true. The PPV broadcast on Saturday Night will be three hours of wrestling with an extra half hour for the Travis Tritt concert. The concert will be after the wrestling.
- The announcers then mention that Goldberg has thrown his hat in the ring for Team WCW at Road Wild.
- They show stills of the return of the white-faced Sting.
- The attack on DDP and Kimberly at Nitro is replayed.
- Giant vs. Lizmark, Jr.
- In less than fifteen seconds, chokeslam, pin.
- Some guy in the crowd has a "Goldberg, I'm Next" sign with a hole in the middle that he's sticking his head through.
- After the match, Giant gets on the microphone and talks smack about Goldberg and challenges him.
- Crowd: "Giant sucks!"
- Before breaking for commercial, we are treated to a Goldberg montage.
- The Wolfpac is in the house. Actually, it only seems to be Lex Luger.
- Oh, boy, a new Wolfpac t-shirt. Everybody drink!
- Man, I feel for this crowd. That Nitro I went to was awful live. Lots of talking and not much wrestling.
- He seems to have borrowed one of Kevin Nash's scripts for inciting the crowd.
- Luger says that Wolfpac is not "for life", it is "forever".
- The crowd chants "Luger". Why? I have no idea.
- Luger says that the only face he saw on Monday before being knocked out was Scott Hall.
- Luger says that he's not leaving the building tonight until there is a battle between the Black and Red and the Black and White tonight.
- Luger says there are no problems in the Wolfpac, and out come Sting and Konnan, with the new t-shirts.
- Gee, think that match will end in a clean pinfall?
- So, what exactly is the difference between the missions of WCW and the Black and Red?
- Dean Malenko makes his way to the ring to referee a match. Jericho challenges Malenko's integrity and says that he better be impartial refereeing tonight. The highlight of Jericho's soliloquy was when he took his sunglasses off and had another pair on underneath.
- Juventud Guerrera vs. Psychosis with Dean Malenko as referee.
- Guerrera with all the early offense...flying headscissors, big clothesline. Two-count.
- Psychosis turns the tables and is booed by the crowd in a big way.
- Psychosis gives Guerrera some sole.
- Guerrera reverses a move into a Juvi Driver. Two-count only.
- Psychosis with a modified powerbomb.
- Guerrera monkey flips Psychosis out of the ring.
- While Malenko's back is turned, Jericho brains Guerrera with the Cruiserweight belt.
- Psychosis seizes the opportunity and delivers his guillotine legdrop from the top turnbuckle.
- For the pin, Malenko hesitates as Jericho is jumping up and down on the apron screaming for him to make the count. Malenko counts the pinfall. Your winner, Psychosis.
- Oh, God, no. Another nWo Late Night segment.
- Do the people in WCW really sitting around scratching their heads wondering why a taped RAW spanked a live Nitro again this week? If they are, have them call me and I'll be glad to tell them why, for free. I'll just show them this tape.
- Eric Bischoff and Elizabeth and the band...just as bad as every other segment, or so I'm told. This is the first one I've actually been forced to sit through. You guys owe me big time.
- This is so painful...
- Someone nails Bischoff with a beer. Well, that violates my policy on reporting such things, but that's the highlight of the segment thus far.
- Bischoff talks smack about Kimberly and DDP storms the set and nails the seated Bischoff and destroys the set and beats up Bischoff and starts choking Bischoff out until the cops pull him off.
- Bischoff is laid out flat until the Giant comes out and picks him up off the floor and carries him backstage.
- Boy, fifty minutes into it and not much wrestling thus far, huh?
- Big announcement...Hogan was not in the arena, he was back at the hotel watching TV and saw what just happened and is coming down with a bunch of his biker friends. Oh, dear, put the children to bed...they won't be able to handle this.
- Meng vs. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan
- Jim Duggan, on live TV again. With a talent roster as deep as WCW has, Duggan...again.
- Like two big grizzly bears, Meng and Duggan trade power moves.
- Ten punches to the head on the top turnbuckle by Duggan. Drink.
- Hey, Duggan got his tights pulled down! Chug!!!
- Hugh Morrus and Barbarian rush the ring two minutes into the match and beat on Duggan and Meng, presumably causing a no-contest.
- Jimmy Hart comes off the top with the 2x4 and nails Meng on the head, but he no-sells.
- The beatdown on Meng continues until Duggan gets his 2x4 and clears the ring.
- Meng and Duggan face off momentarily but Meng takes off after Barbarian and Morrus.
- Schiavone does a live advertisement for that motorcycle brand that's sponsoring the PPV.
- Hennig, Rude, Hall, Vincent, Adams and Norton come out, presumably to answer the Red and Black challenge. Lord knows they're certainly not coming out to wrestle.
- Some woman who looks like Jessica Hahn in the crowd.
- Rude talks smack about Goldberg...says that he won't survive the over-the-top battle royale. I thought the battle royale was "last man standing".
- Hall's got the mic. He says the Red and Black need to go to the Nitro Girls' dressing room and get some Monostat-7 to clear up their yeast infection. Ooooh, I don't that that was in the script. He talks trash about each of the Red and Black individually, including Kevin Nash being "on Queer Street and liking it".
- Right before the Black and White leave the ring, Scott Hall does a dX crotch chop. Wow, it's kind of neat watching someone trying to get themself fired.
- WCW World Television Champion (?) Stevie Ray vs. Steve "Mongo" McMichael.
- For some odd reason, the champ enters first.
- Mongo rushes the ring, but Stevie Ray stomps him down.
- Stevie Ray with the early advantage, Mongo comes back with two tackles, but Stevie Ray regains the advantage.
- Chavo runs to the ring claiming he's been notarized as the TV champ and he picks up the belt and goes to leave.
- Stevie Ray leaves the ring to confront Chavo in the aisle, and as Stevie Ray gets counted out, Chavo goes to leave, Stevie Ray grabs him, and Chavo clocks him with the belt.
- Chavo gets a few punches in, but Stevie Ray starts beating on him.
- Mongo jumps in, Chavo takes off, and Stevie Ray chases Chavo backstage.
- Your winner by countout, Mongo. Stevie Ray retains the title.
- Stills from the Steiners and Bagwell bit from Monday.
- Tony Schiavone calls out Rick Steiner. After a few problems with the music, Rick appears.
- Another interview that goes nowhere. The high point being in the middle when Rick Steiner forgets his lines. Stuttering John could have handled it better.
- The interview ends with Rick challenging Scott to face him like a man.
- * yawn *
- Advertisment for the new Big Sexy shirt. Drink again. Rather than buy a shirt for $20, buy a book for $15.
- WOW!!! A fantastic montage of Arn Anderson with some great classic footage. It included clips with Ole, Tully, Barry Windham, and even Paul Roma. Totally awesome. The only bad thing is that the visuals were a little weird and didn't snap well. So, no pictures, sorry.
- Saturn vs. Kanyon vs. Raven...supposedly.
- Sign: "Lodi, how's your fingers?"
- Raven says that Kanyon is on his team and Saturn will be in a handicap match at the pay-per-view. As practice, Saturn will have to fight a handicap match against Riggs and Sick Boy tonight.
- Saturn cleans house of the two goons. Lodi comes in and gets his broken fingers stepped on.
- Finally, Riggs nails Saturn with a clothesline, and the rudos go to work.
- Saturn eventually ducks a double-team move to get out of trouble.
- Eventually, Saturn pins Sick Boy following a Spiccoli Driver.
- Raven runs in and Saturn attacks him. Riggs jumps into the fray and knees Saturn in the back.
- Saturn eventually falls victim to the Evenflow DDT.
- Another live advertisement for the American Ironhorse motorcycle.
- Thunder next week is on Thursday in Fargo, North Dakota.
- Disco Inferno w/ Tokyo Magnum vs. Eddie Guerrero
- Disco Inferno comes out first to his music, followed by Tokyo Magnum coming out to Alex Wright's music.
- Next week on Thunder, Bret Hart will defend his U.S. Title against Lex Luger.
- Eddie Guerrero goes to work early, highlighted by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.
- Disco hits his piledriver early, but only gets a two-count.
- Disco with the spinning neckbreaker, but Eddie gets a foot on the ropes.
- Disco misses the big fistdrop.
- Eddie comes back with a Scott Norton-style backbreaker.
- Eddie goes up top for the Frog Splash, Tokyo Magnum pushes Guerrero off, but actually pushes him right into a frog splash onto Disco and Eddie gets the pin. Tokyo is beside himself.
- Buff Bagwell is on the phone. They bring Rick Steiner to the announcers' booth. Buff attempts to get heel heat from the crowd, but I don't think the crowd can hear the phone call, so there's dead silence as Buff tries to get a reaction. Buff claims Scott Steiner cannot wrestle at Sturgis due to the chair shot from Rick. Buff prattles on, and they cut off the phone call.
Where this leaves the Steiner vs. Steiner match, I have no idea.
- Another Leno/Bischoff promo.
- Voodoo Chile plays. Ugh. Here comes Hogan, Bischoff (limping) and Disciple.
- Some footage of Leno training will be shown on the Tonight Show tonight.
- Heenan offers to host the Tonight Show if Leno gets taken out. Why not? He did a great job on The Bobby Heenan Show.
- As Hogan prattles on, Disciple's standing back there looking like such a dork.
- Hogan says Kimberly was on the back of his bike riding here.
- Hogan says that if DDP actually makes it to Sturgis in one piece, Hogan will break every bone in his body. Hogan says he'll break DDP's neck just for Kimberly.
- Hogan makes Bischoff promise to save some of Leno for him.
- That tirade provided no value whatsoever.
- I stand corrected...Hogan spit in into the camera lens. Drink!
- Where were Hogan's biker buddies?
- Scott Hall, Brian Adams and Curt Hennig w/no escorts vs. Sting, Lex Luger and Konnan
- After the Black and White make their entrance, commercial break.
- The Black and Red make their entrance. Sting is Heat Miser tonight.
- The Black and White vacate the ring immediately, but Red and Black follow them out to start the match.
- The fight goes on outside for a while, and eventually Luger and Hall go to the ring and start fighting there. Luger manhandles Hall.
- Hennig is tagged in.
- Luger manhandles Hennig, pushes him into the Red and Black corner, Hennig is pinballed. Adams and Konnan are tagged in.
- Adams beats down Konnan. He systematically takes Konnan apart. With the referee distracted, Konnan is triple-teamed.
- Hennig comes in via an illegal tag and continues working on Konnan. Hall is tagged in.
- Fallaway slam by Hall.
- Crowd starts chanting "Wolfpac".
- Konnan makes the hot tag to Sting. Sting cleans house and gives Hall crotch chops. Wow.
- The Black and White rush in on a blown spot as no one knows what to do and they just look at each other.
- Konnan and Adams are left as the legal men in the ring as everyone else fights on the floor and Konnan hits Adams with the Carpetmuncher.
- Konnan gets Adams in the Tequila Sunrise and after what seems like five minutes, Hennig runs in to break it up.
- Chaos ensues in the ring, and Konnan rolls up Adams for a surprise three-count.
- The Wolfpac are kings of the hill standing in the ring. Fade to black.
- Er, that's it.
- Trivia Answer: "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan
- Look for the Road Wild report on Sunday morning.
